Daft online reviews occasionally make it into the mainstream media, and they don't get much sillier than complaints about mountains. From being too high or too hard, to lacking summit toilets or a view on the day the reviewer visited, we've mined Tripadvisor for some real crackers. Clearly not all hill-goers share the same expectation of what the experience can and should provide - and who's to say they're wrong? Perhaps it's too easy to sneer at the less hill-savvy, but we're not above cheap laughs. We'd just like to hope some of these were tongue-in-cheek...
"Did the pyg track there and back. Found the ascent horrific - so exhausting. Rubbish views of ugly rocks and a couple of lakes sometimes. Would never do it again. Parking facilities so poor - I've damaged my car because had to find my own parking after the main car park doesn't let you in if you haven't precooked. Rubbish trip. Never again."
Not fit for a civilized country
"Just finished the 7h trail, and I have to say it is a SHAME that in 2018 there is such a path in the UK.
"This not for the 7 hours needed (normal), or the 1300 m (400ft) of positive difference in altitude (you start at 40 m on sea level, and the top is at 1344m..). But for the conditions of the path: 50% of it is a STONE FIELD, with loose stone and cobbles, very dangerous for your ankles and knees. This makes the ascent a NIGHTMARE.
"Believe me, there are dozens of nicer and easier walks in beautiful Scotland."
This mountain sums up Scotland
"The walk was boring and un imaginative, lacked 4G signal in many places and when you got to the top you couldn't see anything. Basically this mountain summed up Scotland as a whole! A big disappointment! Also there is snow at the top... I don't like a snow."
Too high and totally undeveloped
"Compared to Snowdon summit this is a weak and poorly developed visitor attraction. Snowdon has a funicular railway to carry people to the summit. At Snowdon summit there is an excellent visitor centre with the full range of facilities - and the whole operation attracts hundreds of thousands of visitors per year.
"Ascending to the summit of Skiddaw is an exhausting experience on the basis that the only means to get up there is to walk. It is just too high and too steep for most people. How can the Lake District National Park people expect people to go up there?. Be warned that ... THERE ARE NO FACILITIES AT THE SUMMIT. If you actually make it to the summit and then need the toilet then that is just too bad!
"I visited the summit this last weekend and was very disappointed with the experience. There was sod all to see and do there. If people had to pay to go there then nobody, and I mean nobody, would bother with it. The National Park people should charge visitors £5 to go the summit and use the proceeds to develop it. Essentials include a proper visitor centre. Long to medium term, consideration should be given to building a funicular railway to Skiddaw summit."
Dismal place, not a lot to do there
"OK, I guess it is the third highest peak in England. But there isn't a lot to do there. I was up there this weekend and the so called "summit shelter" was full of snow. There was a gale force wind blowing and a fierce wind chill factor. Every surface was covered with a crust of ice.
"What the summit needs is a café, visitor centre and toilet block. If these were installed then it would offer a much more satisfactory experience for visitors. For sure this would attract many more visitors and would generate some profit for the local business community. That apart, it's quite hard work getting up there and this excludes anyone who is even slightly mobility impaired. Perhaps consideration should be given to installing a cable car system to carry people up?.
"To be fair, Skiddaw summit is not bad but it needs a lot more development to turn it into a serious visitor attraction."
Not for 1st time climbers!!!
"Me and my boyfriend attempted climbing mount skiddaw this weekend and it was hard to say the least! Firstly the mountain is so steep it makes it difficult to even climb, nevermind the constant mud/ice/ snow taking up the walk way making it extremely slippy. When you aren't in the walkway you are greeted by massively thick snow almost up to your knees so there is literally no comfortable place to walk. After the long slog of making it up the mountain to get back down is actually the hardest part, with the huge steep walkway posing a great likelihood of you falling over. Views are stunning however a very long and difficult walk to get there !!"
Not worth it
"The way up is too exhausting and down to dangerous. View is ok, but not special. If you like mountains, you can try the Arthur's Seat. If not, do not visit the mountain."
"Not a chair in sight - had to sit on the grass, and was left with an unsightly wet patch so it looked like I had soiled myself."
This mountain is too big, too high and too steep!
"This hill is very steep and difficult to access: the car park is up miles of twisting / turning and VERY steep narrow lanes and even when you can park you are still a mile from the summit - which can only be accessed by walking over what can only be described as very rough ground. Unless you are fit, active and very into exercise I strongly suggest you just look at it online or from the bottom. No ambulance could get to you, you would have to be choppered off!"
"We took the route from Great Langdale. It was horrible! I'm happy I did it and it was rewarding, but I would never do it again, ever! The paths are not marked and even though we had a map, we still managed to get lost doing extra 1.5h through some pikes and hills we didn't plan to see. It took us about 7h in total. The hike is really tough, very far away from a pleasurable mountain trek. The weather was nice at the beginning, later on it was raining and it was quite cold. We had to walk pretty fast as we didn't want to finish the walk in complete darkness. It's very steepy, very rocky and really hard. You don't really admire the views around you as you need to stay focus and watch your steps. At the summit spectacular views didn't greet us, just a lot of clouds and nothing else. Again, I'm happy I did it, I really wanted to do it, but I wouldn't do it again."
View not good
"I don't know what all the fuss is about, when I went I could only see rocks and wet grass and mist. By chance I had a map and compass in my bag and had to use it or I would not have found the way off. I would instead go to a mountain which is not in the clouds."