UKH

I had a meeting this week where someone that I do some work with introduced me to a trustee of his new charity. After the meeting, I thought I would see what the guys background was as I didn’t get a huge amount of information about him. Turns out that amongst other things, he is Harry Styles dad.

I thought this mildly interesting and just mentioned it in passing to my wife and step-daughter. To my surprise, they both considered this incredibly exciting (I’m pretty sure neither is a 1D fan) and told me off for not mentioning it earlier.

I lost my auntie a few years back. At her funeral the minister told stories of her early life. Apparently in an interview by Rolling Stone magazine early in his career John Lennon was asked who his first love was. Turns out it was my aunt. 

Bruce Jones - ex Les Battersby off Corrie - once tapped me on the shoulder, after hours in a boozer, and asked me if I'd like to make up a hand in a three card brag session. 

It transpires that Bruce was the bloke who discovered the mutilated body of Jean Jordan on a Manchester allotment. I am therefore only 3 degrees separated from the Yorkshire Ripper, and I also pocketed a fair bit of Les Battersby's cash. 

1. A friend and I were alone in a lift at the National Theatre in London. Dustin Hoffman got in the lift, alone, and rode up. We were astonished 

2. I was in a queue checking into a hotel at Gatwick. John Cleese was a couple of people ahead of me in the queue, also checking in. Everyone was just stood staring at him and he looked very uncomfortable. He checked in and moved off to the lifts as quickly as he could

In my twenties and having a rare early(ish) Saturday night, I get woken up about 4am by loud voices in my living room. I walk bleary-eyed downstairs ready to ask people to shut the f*ck up a little bit, walk in and see my two housemates, a guy I don't recognise and Bez from the Happy Mondays all getting medicated in my living room. "Woah, yalright mate?" Bez asks clearly startled by my half-dressed and decidedly less than 24-hr Party Persona. I look again at the scene before me and grumble "F*ck this" before shuffling back to bed.

Glastonbury 2000 I bumped into Kelis and made an honest and I think pretty good attempt at getting her to come on the lash for a bit but she said she had to sing on stage or something. My word she's gorgeous.

I once stood Johnny Dawes in Fred West's front room, though it was no longer a house. He wanted to know where it was, so I showed him... he nearly choked on his kebab. A few weeks later I walked into the St. Govan's Inn on a Friday evening in August. It was stacked with climbers and Johnny was sitting there with Leo Holding and he called out my name across the pub... everyone turned and looked at me! A few days later I was in the St. Govan's Inn again. This time, there was just me, my brother, Glenda Huxter and Lynn Hill, who gave me the most beautiful smile.

I also saw Ian McCaskill in The Saracen's Head at Symond's Yat (he didn't say "hello") and I also knew the mother of a member of a famous boy band from around 10 years ago, but I can't remember who or the name of the band.

So I was standing in the Central Lobby of the Palace of Westminster, waiting for Charles Kennedy to turn up for a meeting.

Out of one of the archways on the other side of the lobby strides a member of the cabinet. His voice booms out across the lobby, "Jim! What are you doing here? Don't tell me. Helicopters!"

Thanks Danny.

https://www.ukhillwalking.com/forums/winter_climbing/helicopters_civilian_vers...

I climbed with the guy a few weeks ago who turned off Beau Biden's life support.

I also once bought shampoo off David Duchovny's cousin.

My Dad almost killed Willie Nelson in Hawaii.

I once stopped Chris Sharma putting salt into his coffee.

I met Ahmad Shah Masoud 2 weeks before his was assassinated.

I got personally ordered off stage by Fat Boy Slim.

My wife doubled for John Mills' legs in a scene in a Tale of 2 Cities.  Our dog was an extra in the Disney Film Togo - I can arrange an autograph is you want.

I once shared my tent with a future winner of the Turner Prize after witnessing a near miss on her first attempt at trad leading which I was unofficially in charge of. Thank God for routes where the rope goes over a buttress.

I’ve also been on telly with Suggs with very little warning and zero prep time

Met Jack and Meg White 19 years ago shortly before they hit the big time, I’d vaguely heard of them and said so; Jack seemed unimpressed that I wasn’t licking his boots. 

Climbing-wise, I’ve actually guided Jim Donini 

My mums cousin designed the iconic Jack Daniels bottle and the original brightly coloured Brillo pad box. 
 

A very well lubricated client loudly sang “for she’s a greasy lover” at Phil Collins and his girlfriend in a hotel restaurant. I was mortally embarrassed and somehow talked us out of getting chucked out of both the restaurant and hotel(where we were staying). 

I was cooking in a restaurant in Toronto (Hollywood of Canada) in the late 90s, and was carrying a tray of vol-au-vents to function upstairs. Eagle Eye Cherry comes sauntering past and nicks one with a wink.

I was once on a game show called Schools Challenge (modeled on University Challenge) with Mark Radcliffe as host.

I'd be more interested if he were related to Nobby. 

Stood outside a post office with my dog (80kg Newfoundland) and a booming voice called out saying "that's a fine dog you have there". I turned around to to see Tom  Baker in a long coat and hat looking just like the Dr. Who from my childhood.

I was slightly disappointed on the missing  scarf though

... 

Here's the clear fame winner!

All the others are just low-budget stalkers, but waitout is, dare I say, "hair to the throne" of celebrity greatness

Of the four times that I've taken a summer holiday in Polzeath in the last fifteen years, twice David Cameron was there. The first time, when he would have still been the leader of the opposition, I passed him on the cliffs between Polzeath and Daymer Bay and we said hello. The second time was whilst he was Prime Minister, but thankfully I avoided him.

I once had a conversation with David Thewlis in the toilets of my local pub, I had a briefer conversation with Noel Gallagher in toilets of the Underworld in Camden, then the whole band later upstairs in the Worlds End. Bonehead was by far the friendliest. I once exited a portaloo to find my childhood hero, Steve Cram, next in the queue to use it.

I was at the Commonwealth Games in Manchester in 2002 with my dad, he mentioned that the guy we were watching winning the bronze medal in the Decathlon, Jamie Quarrie, was married to his cousin. I've met him since, he is the nephew of Jamaican great, Don Quarrie.

Johnny Ball bought me a pizza in Whitley Bay

Well, if you think that's living the dream get this: I once saw Princess Anne going into a shop

Back in the mid 1990s when I was living in South London, I got friendly with my neighbours, who were actors. He was more successful than her, I'd regularly spot him in small roles in dramas on the TV. Then  she got a fairly major part in Eastenders and suddenly she couldn't even pop to the shops without getting mobbed. Coincidentally, a mate of mine, a mature student on my course, who did some driving for the BBC, used to drive her from Balham to Elstree every morning.

I've met baby Dee and stood next to David Tibet of current 93 at the toilet urinal in Cheltenham cafe.

Saw badly drawn boy in a food wagon queue at the green Man festival. 

Saw Bjork mulling around at the warp records lighthouse party .  

Met Jimmy Carl black from the mothers of invention after a gig.  

Ap

I once had a p*ss next to Chris Bonington. 

Whilst at Uni I had lunch with Sir Patrick Moore who had just given a talk in our Physics Dept. A few students got invited along to the bunfight afterwards. It was the only lecture I'd been to that had a bouncer on the door!

My wife had the same experience, except it was Irvine Welsh in her front room. She says he was an arrogant wanker and has hated him ever since.

I have David Banks signature somewhere on a cassette cover sheet of a learned historical treatise on the origins of the Cyber Race.   He was for a long time the Cyber Leader, including the time of their notorious attack on Windsor.  IIRC I got it at Wimbledon theatre in the 1980s at a stage Dr Who featuring Jon Pertwee and lots of real daleks and cybermen.

Shook Lord Denning's hand as a student and had him admire my scarf.

If there are any fans of contemporary avant-garde poetry on here, you'll recognise the names R F Langley and J H Prynne. I was lucky enough to be taught by both of them and they were as inspiring as you'd expect.

I shook hands with Camilla's gynaecologist... 

He came and gave our school science society a lecture in the early 70s - a sellout and he was fantastic.

I failed to recognise Leon Goosens when he arrived to give a concert recital and asked me for directions.

In the 70s I was assisted by suggestions from prof David Bellamy fixing a child's toy at a New Year's Eve do.  He seemed as shy as I was and grateful for the distraction.  My sister went toad and newt spotting with him in a quarry just off Crawleyside above Stanhope.

That's nothing, I saw Princess Di driving her car through Cricklewood.

I'd be impressed if that was recent.

My car makes a very, very brief appearance on the Ron Fawcett film Rock Athlete.

Whilst working in London and staying at the Tower Bridge Hotel Richard Todd, the actor, and I had a couple of drinks together and chatted at the bar.

Al

I spilled Barbara Windsor's drink, backstage at the Astoria. She gave me a withering look. Carry on films have never been the same since

It was at the height of her "fame", hence the surprise that she was driving herself (albeit with a huge police escort) and that she was in Cricklewood.

I once mistook Dame Margot Fonteyn for a shop assistant. Saw Paul Daniels putting petrol in his roller somewhere on the A1.

I don't want to name names, but despite having zero to do with show business, I'm actually friends with a genuine Hollywood A-lister, who even once lent me their Manhattan apartment for the weekend. Which was nice. 

I sat at a table next to Bono, in a Dublin curry house. He spent ages looking through the menu, and I was sorely tempted to enquire "Still haven't found what you're looking for?".

I once served Steve McManaman with a copy of FourFourTwo magazine, when I was working a till during the graveyard shift at WHSmith in Manchester Airport. He immediately opened it to a centrefold spread of himself, and said "This lad's off on his holidays!".

Tony Audenshaw - Bob Hope off Emmerdale - once presented me with a prize for winning a pub quiz. Tony still holds a Guinness World Record for running the London Marathon while wearing a nappy and being dressed as a giant baby. 

My best is my sister's very tenuous claim as its a bit surreal.

Before going to college for reasons best known to herself, she volunteered as help in a convent. One evening she walked in on 2 nuns wrestling while others looked on. The nuns said 'its Thursday, we always wrestle on Thursday"

She told this story to her pal at college, who was also pals with Nick Park. Years on, in "the curse of the wererabbit" the vicar is clearly reading a magazine' nun wrestling'

coincidence? I think not.

Thank you for your time, I'll be off now (you did say tenuous) 

Oh, how did I forget: In Stafford, 1998, with my girlfriend at the time for some early Friday evening drinks and we saw this really cool garishly painted old bus with some hippy types hanging round outside it. We got talking and they invited us up on the roof and we had a beer and a spliff. Our merriment was interrupted by a very grumpy Ken Kesey who we'd woken up bashing around on top of the Furthur bus which I'd read of but never seen. My parents' jaws hit the floor when I nonchalantly told them who we'd met and how.

Just remembered, but would would love to forget, having dinner with Jimmy Saville.  Well almost.

I was working in Torquay at the time and staying at the Imperial Hotel as it was the only place open in winter.  At dinner time I went down to a rather posh dining room, silver service and all that.  On the next table sat Jimmy Saville.  We were the only two in the room.  We gave each other a cursory good evening and then totally ignored each other.

Another post, tenuous links to infamy perhaps?

Al

My mate Colin was a plumber who used to do the odd job for Mike Summerbee (ex Man City and England) when he lived in the Stockport area. Summerbee invited Colin and his missus to a party, and they duly turned up, knocked on the door, and had it opened to them by Rambo.

Turns out that Summerbee had featured in the movie Escape to Victory with Sylvester Stallone. Stallone was in the UK, and Summerbee invited him to the party and requested that he answer the door to guests and take their coats. 

I've sparred with a bloke who later became famous by marrying a woman with large breasts. 

I once spent a week skiing with Peter Habelar in Mayerhofen. We only talked skiing, but did say that we had met earlier at one of the very early bmc conferences.

Another memory is being introduced and shaking hands with Don Whillans by Al Rouse. Then we all had a convivial beer together.

Wilfred Noyce came to my school to present prizes for our Speech Day. Afterwards we spoke in the school library at the reception for the prizewinners, I mentioned that I too was going to be a climber. He wished me well. He was sadly killed the following year with Robin Smith.

Escape to Victory is possibly the greatest film ever made. I've watched it many times.

I once walked passed the late great Terry Nutkins in the gents at Tebay services. One of us held the door for the other. Can't remember which way round that was.

Also once met Prince William at a climbing wall. Seemed like a decent bloke having a good time with his mates (I'm sure at least one of them was security). I mentioned to him that it would be a good idea to unclip the draw in front of him as he was top roping. Once he was finished all the kids came round and he sat chatting to them

If this is for real, what was the story?

For the record, his surname is 'Habeler.'

I heard him give a talk once, and I thought he was great: funny, wry, and self-effacing.

I once went to Las Vegas with "Security Steve" from the Jeremy Kyle Show.

As true as the day is long, my Dad being about the most sober and academic man alive, also likes Willie Nelson.

He was at a conference in Hawaii and early one morning (by my Dad's standards that means well before sunrise) was driving to the beach for a swim when a jogger tripped on the sidewalk beside him and stumbled into the front of my Dad's car. It was close enough that the jogger - Willie Nelson - turned in fear as my Dad hit the brakes, Willie bracing his hands onto the bonnet and staring through the windscreen at my Dad.

Dad says he assumed Willie was out of it so got out to check, and after the initial 'are you OK's' Dad said he was a fan of his music and that's about it. For all the dope and touring Willie also keeps fit (this was 30 years ago, but he was already old then).

My Dad only told me after I asked about his trip, and after boring details of work and tourist stuff mentioned as an afterthought, "oh and I nearly killed Willie Nelson one morning".

Ok thanks - nice story.

Willie's 88 now, and still going strong. He's had the odd health scare over the years - but I think he will live forever.

My late aunty was a dancer in Las Vegas(possibly a euphemism...) and was pals with both Elvis and granny from the Beverly Hillbillies.

I hope he does, he brings a certain light to the world. Sad to think what would have resulted had my Dad been driving a bit faster.

So did I!!

I was buying ‘groceries’ in a shop in Boulder, California, and this bloke asked if I could move my trolley to let him past - Quentin Tarantino. I off course told him to “f*ck of you c*ck sucking mutha f*cker.’ 

I once found his ice axe and gave it back to him at the car.  He’d dropped it after bum sliding the last bit of Custs Gully on Great End. 

Hopefully Willie was careful next time he was on the road again...

Good to see you back on here, I had wondered if it was you after the Iran thread.

On topic:

Shared a house and am still friends with Mohsen Makhmalbaf's nephew.

Worked briefly with Alice Roberts before she was a household name. Great company, massive crush after about 2 seconds that has persisted to this day.

Met Robert Fisk in the Pyrenees without realising who he was, despite me being an avid Fisk reader. He nearly broke my hand when he shook it.

Drank with Emir Kusturica in Auxerre, not long after his second Palme d'Or, in exile from Milosevic's goons. Again, I didn't realise who he was as I didn't know what he looked like at the time though he was a hero of mine.

Drank very heavily with Jennifer Saunders' brother in Aberdeen. Anyone who inhabited Aberdeen during the 90s will have done the same, he was very sociable.

Got a lift from Jenny Eclair from Glen Shiel to Skye. Really nice, good company.

Met a famous gangster, whom I won't name but he has had a film made about him, through work. Turns out we were born on the same day. A friendly and polite man for a multiple murderer.

A friend years ago hitched to and from the Mull of Kintyre. He described getting a lift out of Campbelltown from a "Really cool American woman in an old Range Rover. She lived there, said she was a photographer and her husband was a musician."

 

I knew a mountaineer who went on to levitate a frog and play with sellotape.

The frog got him an Ig Nobel prize.
The sellotape got him a Physics Nobel Prize. 

with or without saag aloo? 

Nice story. But aaaarrggh! My ears! That song!

My stepson's wife is an extra in Poldark

I shook hands with Yasser Arrafat.

I also picked up 2 famous people who were hitchhiking; Hillary and Tensing.

That reminds me of one I'd surprisingly forgotten - I spent one whole evening with Al Rouse in his house once and had dinner with him - he was such a nice guy, I'll not forget it or him

Another one I'd amazingly forgotten, I had dinner one evening with Indira Gandhi (then Prime Minister of India) in London once (a couple of years before she was assassinated). There were about 50 people having dinner too, but I was there. She seemed really nice, and greeted everyone with huge smiles

I was at school with Arlene Stuart, one of the presenters on Landward.  Stuart isn’t her real surname.

I have had a work related telephone conversation with Will Self, who was extremely polite and pleasant and have also met Mhairi Hedderwick (writer of Katie Morag children’s stories), who was also delightful 

I spent an evening in a (the ?) bar on Coll with friends who lived there & were joined by someone for a while who was good company. Later discovered that Mharie was Mhairie Hedderwick who was visiting the island.

Was once hitchhiking when 'Silence is golden' ( youtube.com/watch?v=n03g8nsaBro& ) came on the radio & the driver commented that he'd been in the Tremeloes. No reason for him to make it up

I once made Helen Sharman a cup of tea. 

I went to the same primary school as her.

I remember, just, seeing Spike Milligan at a Roman archeological site, aged about 6. Dad in full goon fanboy mode, younger sister asking if he believed in God, which was her usual question to random passers by at the time. I'd give a lot to remember his reply.

- Acted as tour guide to the Prime Minister of St Kitts & Nevis when I was at college. 
 

- Was once tossed a new toilet roll by George Alagiah in an adjacent toilet cubicle in Television Centre

- Gave Howard Marks a light outside of Birmingham New St station (it wasn’t a cigarette)  

I once worked in a building named after her.

It's not even tenuous, is it?

Agree, super nice guy. Sadly missed. Will always be remembered.

(Hope I'm not telling tales out of school but) Steve Dean's recently done a superb retrospective of Al. I think he said it's due out in Climber later this year. It really is worth looking out for.

Mick

Thanks very much for that - I'll look out for the retrospective later

My dad ran a model railway company (something I was incredibly embarrassed about as a teen), one of his customers was Peter Waterman.

Spotted Jarvis Cocker throwing shapes in a London night club... Stared at him for a bit.

Saw Michael Portillo coming down the street on the opposite side of the road once and said "Look, there's Michael Portillo." to my mate.

That's about it really.

I got very drunk on Tiree with Paolo Nutini.

I resuscitated someone in the pits with prodigy playing live, I like to think it was to the tune of 'Take me to the hospital' but I can't be sure.

On my first visit to Chamonix during a wet 1973 season, Chris Bird and I beat Al Rouse and (I think) Pete Minks at rods (table football) in the basement of the Bar Nash. 

I once sold a packet of fags to Eric Bristow.

Sat next to Griff Rhys Jones in Covent Garden Wagamama’s.
He didn’t stop talking long enough to actually eat anything. I couldn’t get away fast enough. 

I've always been fascinated by the duality in people who can murder, and also have a sense of morals about not liking bullies, or children and women being hurt, or the everyday person being squashed and taken advantage of, while seeing killing rivals/other criminals as a part of being involved in that way of life.

If we're doing tenuous links to infamy...

I shared a house with Stalin's daughter for a few months in the 80s. I never asked her about her dad though.

I worked as a hospital porter alongside Phil Oakey.

I pissed alongside Anthony Hopkins at South Mimms services.

I played in a college band with Jerry Dammers.

(All above in the seventies)

Oh yes, I chatted, and shook hands with, Stevie Wonder at a disability conference in Los Angeles in 2003.

We may have a winner. I'm guessing she was nothing like Andrea Riseborough?

I cracked a joke that made OMD laugh during a retro computer festival at Bletchley Park in 2010.  They were watching a BBC Micro at one of the stands playing one of their tunes.

Oh, and as a schoolkid we were lined up for inspection by Princess Alexandra at the disbanding/Laying up of the colours of the Durham Light Infantry in 1968.

(Tenuous link to infamy - this century the school has been the subject of widespread publicity and historical child sex abuse investigations into our then headmaster, 50 years or so ago)

Justin Beiber booked a session at an outdoor adventure place I worked and I was rotad to guide it.

But then I got kicked off the rota because he wanted pretty girls as guides and then he didn't show up - perhaps because it was raining? I got to dig a hole in the rain instead.

So my tenuous link to fame is my mates guided JBs mates and/or I have been simultaneously rejected and stood up by him. 

I co-hosted Blockbusters with Bob Holness for 5 years back in the 80’s in Dubai. 

That is a brilliant film, and performance, but no, I didn't recognise the person I knew. To be fair, she was in her twenties in the film and her sixties when I knew her. And she'd been through some mad stuff in between.

During the infamous BA software crash a few years ago, I was denied access to Terminal 5 at Heathrow. Jeremy Clarkson was behind me and got waved straight through to the First Class check in. B*****d!

I was once offered a pound coin swap by Jim Bowen when mine didn't work at the Booths car park in Kirkby Stephen.

My partner has stroked Robert Plant's dogs (while he was on the other end of the leads and she didn't notice who it was).

We both shook hands with an American chap who had shaken hands with Barack Obama. This was in 2008 at the foot of Alpe d'Huez when following the Tour de France.

When she was in her teens, my mum was the bridesmaid for a bloke who auditioned for the part of Oz on auf wiedersehen pet but lost to Jimmy Nail.

Beat that for a lame to fame. 

Ha, that reminds me of a tale a friend told me of a skiing trip to the US (I can't recall where). He was about to descend on his nordic gear when a small, very thick-set man in an expensive one-piece ski-suit and with a strong Austrian accent appeared beside him, made some approving comments about his chosen style of skiing then vanished down the slope. 

Did you ask him if you could have a P?

Back in the late 80’s, I was riding my mountain bike through a pedestrianised section of Warrington town centre (at the time I didn’t think about whether I should have been doing that).  

A chap stepped backwards into my path and I ran into him.  Hard enough to lift my back wheel but not enough to knock him over, or for me to crash.

It was Irish comedian Jimmy Cricket - catchphrase “Come ‘ere, there’s more”.

He seemed to be practicing his lines from a script and barely noticed me.  He was very tall.

I also one once shared a sauna with an actress from Hollyoaks.  I can’t remember her name.  It was just me and her.  I spent all of the time trying not to stare at her - which was difficult as she was very pretty indeed.

My wife and her friends used to do knock a door run on Jimmy Saville's flat in Salford.  Luckily he never answered.

Rather disappointing.... About 12-13yrs ago I met Seb Coe at a business do. He was speaking at it partly due to the impending London 2012 Olympics. Sadly, whilst I wanted to engage with him as the medal winning athlete, he insisted on being addressed as "Lord Coe" and never shifted from the political persona.

Errrrrrrrrr possibly a wee bit tenuous, ThunderCat....... Thanks anyway

My brother's other hall's cousin played the policeman on Father Ted.

I went to a dinner at the British Embassy in Helsinki with a small BBC team centered around Terry Wogan, who was very funny and good company in person, and the other old Radio 2 chap, the Scottish one - who I think is still on? I've never listened to Radio 2, but my parents were very impressed, I sat next to him - err Ken... going to Google now... Ken Bruce! That's the one. Anyway he's delightful, hilariously funny but just genuinely nice. Oddly I was invited by the SIS officer.

I also spent the day with Hans Blix at the height of his fame. Also a friendly chap but it took me all day to pluck up the courage to ask if he had seen Team America: World Police. Turns out he hadn't, but his grandkids had and had suggested that grandad might not want to see the sad demise of puppet "Hans Blix of the United Nations" (said in your best bad North Korean accent).

My first trip to the alps that summer too - it rained for a solid 2 weeks in the valley (snow higher). I was probably in there somewhere! 

That's cool. I gathered to meet Samira at a film festival once but was too stupefied with stars in my eyes to actually speak to her when the opportunity came.

I once played the straight man so Mark 'Donno' Donaldson could pull an embarrassing practical joke on another lad.

Did 6th form Chemistry with John Deacon from Queen, messed about with guitars in the common room.

Given a toprope on Quietus by Alan Rouse only to be followed up by John Allen and Steve Bancroft, naked, with the rope tied around their waists.

Advised on how to solo Via Media by Chris Bonington but wimped out at mid-height.

Pissed next to Pete Livesey in the Padarn, having failed to keep up with his 1100 Escort in my RS2000 a couple of weeks earlier. Compared notes.

Lived opposite my mothers best friend whose son, Steven Pippin, nearly won the Turner Prize.

Won a box of cheap chocolates, presented by Kathryn Tickell at one of her concerts.

Met with the surgeon that fixed Craig Revell-Horwood and Darcey Bussell's hips...

I was hitching home from a day cragging many years ago. Stood at Calver crossroads for ages after walking down from Froggatt.

A car eventually stops.
The chap said he could give me a lift along as far as Chapel-en-le-Frith as that was the best spot to drop me as he headed on to catch a flight at Manchester Airport.
Chatting away to the chap and notice a couple of keyboards in flight cases on the back seat.
Chat turns to music and turns out this chap had played in a band.
I ask if I would of heard of his band.
He says " probably, it's called Hawkwind"
I was only cadging a lift off Del Detmar who was travelling back to Canada after doing some session work.

I don't know how everyone has just let this roll on by.

Say what now?!

I was at Sheffield Poly in 1982 and played football on Wednesday afternoons. We won the league and Seb Coe gave out the trophies at the awards evening. He was really pompous and arrogant even then.

That reminds me...

I was chatting to a guy at a rave who told me his name was Thor. I said that I'd only ever met one Thor before, a kid at school whose dad was in Hawkwind (Simon House). To which he replied, "My dad was in Hawkwind". I'm shit at remembering people, and I've only ever met one Thor.

That's awesome. I lent Dave Brock my sun cream in the late 90's. They'd played at a rave where no one knew who the hell they were except about 5 of us. Very, very nice bloke.

I once shared a hot tub, fully naked, with Will Gadd.

I taught English at Dubai College in the 80’s and did some part time work for the Gulf News newspaper. Every Ramadan everything shut down so to entertain the expat community the newspaper decided to run a Blockbusters competition which became enormously popular with hundreds of entries. To put icing on the cake they flew Bob Holness out to run the finals with me. He was utterly charming and enjoyed it so much he did it for 5 years.

That's absolutely brilliant. So glad to find out Holness was just as classy in real life as on the telly box.

Or Breathe?

Inhale, inhale... you're the victim... exhale, exhale, exhale.

My brother-in-law's uncle's widow was in Hollyoaks for about a year, 1996-7.

Another actress friend toured with Tom Conti who gave all cast and crew a copy of his newly published novel before it got remaindered. It took us about 4 minutes to locate the "bad sex in literature" passage. 

My uncle got upgraded on a flight to the US once. Started chatting to the guy next to him, turned out they both played guitar. Chatted for quite a while about music, apparently with no indication of any feeling of superiority on the other guy's part. Towards the end of the flight he asked his name - Robert Zimmerman.

My mum and dad worked in service at Buck palace in the 1960s (where they met), apparently as a baby I was held by the queen and bitten by one of the royal horses - no wonder I am a republican

I like to think Zhukov was like Jason Isaacs.

Rode in a cable car with Carol Vorderman at Alton towers, and then a decade later sang about it on ‘The Going Home Song’ to Greg James on Radio 1.

Did an ice climb after Will Gadd. He took a photo of me. Where I put all 12 ice screws I had, he used 2.
 

Barry Blanchard petted our dog at the crag. 

He's an astounding climber I think, and incomparable when it comes to motivation (though he reckons Tim Emmet is Mr Psyched).

I unknowingly met Craig Luebben and Guy Lacelle in a shanty in China in the early 2000's. No idea who they were until later. Sadly both since died. I got a very brief chance to see them climb from a distance. Met Kyle Dempster in a similar way. All so sad.

I briefly worked in the same lab as Heisenberg's grandson. Looked uncannily like his grandpa at the same age.

I nearly asked former politician Robin Cook to pass me some biscuits in Harrods mistaking him for a member of staff. 

Actually thinking about it it used to be the place to see "famous" people mum once stood in the giftwrap queue in front of Alan Rickman, not too long after love actually came out, she resisted the urge to ask if he was sure he wanted to do this.

and I thought my barry chuckle story was going to win . Dam you . 

I bought Marc Bolan a pint in the bar of the Wolverhampton Civic when the band were still known as Tyrannosaurus Rex. Can't remember what we chatted about though. Maybe the best shampoos for curly hair and the best mascaras for boys. Or Tolkien.

Thor House? He wants to go easy introducing himself in Yorkshire...

His sister lived opposite my mum in Leeds when she was a kid, and he often turned up in his Rolls to see her. My grandad wouldn’t let her go out & join in with the other kids chasing/getting in the car as he thought Saville was a “wrong’un”. 

Discussed the state of Surrey footpaths (correction; bridleways) with Michael Buerk whilst lifting my bike over a gate.

My uncle's wife's brother's wife was the daughter of the winner (*) of the Battle of Jutland, Admiral Jellicoe.

Is that tenuous enough?

* - some might argue that it was more like a no score draw.

I had a piss next to BBC 6Music DJ and former Fall guitarist Mark Riley - he was playing a gig with his then-band, the Creepers, at Hebden Bridge Trades Club. Me and my mates - and Riley, it turned out - took advantage of his mid-set break to go for a slash. We chatted to him a bit, he was very taken with my mate Ian's 'Alien Sex Fiend' t-shirt and dedicated a song to him: "this one's for the alien sex fiend in the toilets".

Another time I had a piss next to Julian Lloyd Webber

My wife is in a Wonder Stuff video, my dad designed the TV Licencing logo, sat next to a very huffy Boy George on a flight to NY, my sister went out with one of Carther The Unstoppable Sex Machine (Fruitbat I think), and I knocked Rolf Harris to the ground outside the BBC Natural History Unit on Whiteladies Rd in Bristol waaaaay back when, was an accident when I was running and not paying attention but you know, karma  . . .

Anyone else on this thread thinking of Al Evans' probable replies?

I suspect that if he had listed them all on separate posts then this thread would have immediately reached archive length.

Probably not that tenuous though!

My manoeuvring of a Narrowboat into Stoke Bruerne appeared on John Craven's Newsround!

We saw the camera and about half an hour later, after mooring, my sister came running out to say I was on TV.

Better still though, my weather picture of Snow on Helvellyn in late May on my 50th birthday made it on to Paul Mooney's slot

I got my photo in the paper with Rev Audry, writer of Thomas the Tank Engine.

Sometimes I suspect that there have been so many people in Hawkwind that everyone has a tenuous link. I used to work with a bloke that did their lights in the 70s. Gets a credit on Space Ritual and everything. 

Ended up in hospital beside Danny Baker's dad, so saw him visiting a few times.

Went to an actor friend's party once and there were a few famous actors there according to my wife, I am not good with names and faces so I don't remember who.

You may be right. I saw them in the Malvern Winter Gardens in 1971, that must count.

There was an old joke that should have been rewritten for Al; I'll take the opportunity now. Tourist finds himself in St Peters Square, with the crowd applauding. He tugs at his neighbour, and asks who are they celebrating. 'Well, I don't know who the bloke in the white gown is, but the bloke next to him is Al Evans.'

When I was a kiddy my Uncle used to chauffeur for the old Duke of Beaufort, he took me to a fireworks display and a woman offered me a sparkler, I looked up and it was Liz Hurley, she lit it for me and gave me a kiss on the cheek. This was in like 97/98 and she was stunning

I sent Bear Grylls down an aerial runway (zipline) once. Had to shake his hand and clip him in. Sorry.

How does one become friends with a Hollywood A-lister?

I was having several beers in Kingston University student union bar when I spotted Lesley Schofield (he played Jonny Briggs' dad on the BBC and also one of the characters on the Death Star in Star Wars) having a pint.  His wife worked in the finance office there and he was waiting for her.

I said hello.  He was quite a nice chap.

Reminds me of when David Beckham went to meet Nelson Mandela. Mandela introduced himself to Beckham.

my sister sold one of her paintings to Charles and Camilla

Quite a few, having been a press photographer for a decade, but the oddest perhaps was standing in a flooded basement with Prince Charles. 

Are you certain you were there at the same place at the same time?

My Father In Law was a cousin of Dougal Haston

Showed Stuart Maconie where to go on his map at Jubilee tower underneath Clougha Pike. I didn't say anything to him, saved it for twitter later.

Richard Hawley spotted walking his dog in Porter Valley.

Jarvis Cocker and Hawley in Fagan's - I was in the back room in a session, as they arrived the regulars said "ey up the celebs are here"

Joss Naylor - but then he'd show up at the opening of a crisp packet

Had a chinwag with Camilla after a concert I was in in the mid-00's. My mate got Brian. Similar vein has seen me on Songs of Praise in the past.

Far too many to quote from airport lounges and queues over the years but three come to mind which are more noteworthy.

1. I bumped into,  quite literally, a pre-PM Boris Johnson just outside Liverpool St Station. 

2. I once took a pee at the adjacent urinal to  Martin O'Neil in  Airport loo.

3. I once got jiggy with a daily sport model, twice!

My mate tipped a third of a pint of Hancocks Best Bitter over Prince Charles's shoes...

You could at least have revealed that his palm was cold and clammy with fear.

Tenuously?

No doubt you already know this but interesting factoid - Richard Todd was at Pegasus Bridge in '44 and then was in "The Longest Day".  I think there is a scene in the film where the character he was playing meets a younger Richard Todd when the bridge is eventually relieved.

Oh Yeah. Nothing tenuous about it.

Ah well. I guess you'll have to take that one on the chin!*

*A lesser man would have turned this into a double entendre, but I'm far too classy for that kind of thing.

I didn't let on that I was on UKC so he wasn't worried about 'accidentally' dying.  He did keep looking around for a hidden toprope to use though, even though he was already on one.

Here's a similar tenuous link to infamy.

A girl who was working for me as a summer intern when I was in Calgary in the early 90's, had the most peculiar christian and surnames I had ever seen. After a few days, I plucked up the courage to ask her where she or had family had originally come from, because I had never seen any names anything like hers. She said words to the effect: "You won't. I checked the whole world to make sure that no one else has the same names. I changed my name by deed poll and chopped up the syllables of characters in Doctor Who and Star Wars and joined up them up in odd ways. I am a grand daughter of Martin Bormann and I wanted to dissociate myself completely from the family name".

I used to work - at different times - with the grand-daughter of Captain 'Blondie' Hasler, who led the CockleShell Heroes raid against the German Navy in WW2, and the daughter of Roger Hunt, of Liverpool and the England '66 world-cup winning team.

When I worked for the local newspaper in Rochdale, I visited the European Parliament as a guest of the local MEP. I was introduced - by his friends, Neil and Glenys Kinnock - to Aung San Suu Kyi. I managed to get a brief interview with her, which appeared in the paper, where she exorted the good burghers of Rochdale to boycott Burma/Myanmar as a holiday destination. I pretty sure nobody from t'Dale went there for their jollies that year, so I claim a 100% success rate.

In 1964, aged 16, I was a guest at an SMC Reception in Edinburgh.  Waiting for the talk about some (to me) obscure route in the Alps to start, I leant on a radiator at the side of the hall for a few minutes beside an amiable young bearded chap.  When the President announced the speaker, Chris Bonington - For It Was He - proceeded to the podium.  The name meant nothing to me.  I was very young and VERY green.

Nearly 45 years ago I called in for a couple of hours at the Dart Hut in the Mount Aspiring National Park in NZ, where I was lending support to a student running a Park visitor survey.  Twenty minutes after I'd left, Ed and Peter Hilary arrived from the other direction to stay overnight.  At least I would have known who they were, if I'd only been there.

These 'nearly' encounters epitomise my lifelong relationship with climbing - always just off the sidelines ...

My Dad's ex-car sat next to Gumdrop. 

I will never be able to see the word 'infamy' without thinking of the famous Kenneth Williams Carry On line: 'Infamy! Infamy! They've all got it in for me!'

My Dad's partner's ex husband did dog psychology on the Queen's corgis.

Yonks ago my wife saw Gary Glitter in Toys R Us (yuk)

It seems a bit odd to choose a peculiar name if you don't want people asking about your roots. Why not just call herself Smith? (Or Schmidt might be more appropriate?)

Both in my time working on the tills at GO Outdoors.

Sold Jarvis Cocker a Discount card and some camping cooking equipment.

Andy Nicholson - ex arctic monkey's bassist a few weeks after he left the band, he got a nice rucksack, cheered him up I suppose.

I  guess because then she might get asked, oh, do you know Sam Smith from your area as well....

I don't know! I suppose the assumption was that most people would not ask but the name; certainly not strangers.

I went to primary school with Larry Lloyd's daughter.  Around the same time, my Dad ran off with Doctor Who's ex-wife.

I've also been (un)reliably informed that I am distantly related to Brian Clough.

(have another like)

I'm pretty sure of what I then thought of him, and his sense of innate superiority spanned the generations, so I think physics is saved, even if it is a new kind of physics.

I was sat in Glaros bar in Masouri, Kalymnos a few years back, reading one of the Inspector Harry Hole crime series when this guy walked past and said 'I wrote that'. Jo Nesbo autographed the book for me, but unfortunately I'd borrowed it from a mate so had to hand it back once I'd finished it. Jo Nesbo climbs 7a apparently

........and was pals with granny from the Beverly Hillbillies.

we have a winner!

And pals with Elvis! That can't be topped.

One cool aunty.

Never read any of his stuff but just read his short online autobiography and he sounds to be a thoroughly decent bloke with a substantial philanthropic streak in him ( and he lets slip that he's managed a 7c)

As a teenager in about 1988 I went with my parents to the vet with whatever pet. As we came out my dad got talking to a man with an alsation, he was the actor who played Sgt McArthur in Emmerdale Farm, nice chap.

Anyway I recgnised him but when he went I said to dad "Did you know him?" just cos they had such a good chat I thought maybe they had met before. Dad then proceeded to laugh at me for not realising who it was, despite the fact I knew full well. My dad was very good at getting things wrong.

Anyway do I win? Once nearly met Sgt McArthur.

When I was about 9, Gina Campbell did a talk at the school where my father taught. I think I received an autographed leaflet of some kind. 

Her story seems very fishy. Giving yourself an attention seeking name and then telling people you've known for only a few days in a work capacity, even if they are the boss, that you are the grand-daughter of Martin Bormann, really doesn't strike me as a convincing way of distancing yourself. (I realise John said she said she was distancing herself BY NAME rather than faking a heritage though)

I've done the same and probably its the same bloke. He used to fight at our club. Was in Hollyoaks I think.

If her story is true, I bet she's regretting picking an unusual name in these days of social media. All it takes is one person who's less discrete than John to mention her name online and she's stuffed. She'll never escape the abuse. On the other hand, why on earth would you make up a story like that?

I just remembered a few others.

Mid 90s, at an ATM in Edinburgh, I heard a dreadful hacking cough behind me. I turned to see a tall, slim and very striking man in a long coat coughing his lungs up. Our eyes met and in that perfect stage-posh English accent one rarely hears, he said, "Urgh, soon be dead thank God." It was Peter O'Toole. 

Had dinner with Mick Aston and went on the piss with Phil Harding, and worked with both. Met Tony Robinson too but he was extremely shy.

Got a lift from Tim Slessor, producer of Life on Earth.

Worked with a guy who drew the cover of The Fall's first album (Live at the Witch Trials) and was a longtime drinking friend of Mark E. Smith.

 

I saw Michael Winner driving a red convertible Dodge Viper down Camden Road once. 

I saw Bernie Ecclestone driving a yellow Ferrari Spider through Hoyland Common ( you need to know Hoyland Common to appreciate the level of incongruity it presented)

I'm really curious now. I wonder if we can persuade John to Google her name and report back on the results. I'm sure all would be revealed.

Yes, Alex Reid. I remember him going on about Hollyoaks too!

I was very surprised but I did not find it fishy. As far as I remember, her mother had settled in Canada after the war.

Maybe she did want the curious to ask her the origin of her name, but merely wanted the her family name out of the public domain. I am trying to remember her name, looking in old work diaries etc.

The year she was working for me was around 1993 and she had changed her name long before that, i.e., long before social media.

It was certainly peculiar, but she was absolutely not an attention seeker.

I'm just to the left of Jay Kay on this album cover. The picture was taken at Les Vieilles Charrues festival in Brittany in 2010. I am just a bit of an indistinguishable blob, but I know which one is me.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rock_Dust_Light_Star

You are right. I have found her name in my old work diaries and she is alive and well and living under the same name, and can be Googled and is on LinkedIn etc. There is absolutely no way I will disclose her name.

Of course I never expected you to tell us her name. I assume when you Google her it reveals who her grandfather was? So anyone she meets who looks her up finds out the history she was trying to distance from. I wouldn't fancy dealing with her email inbox...

Thanks John, point taken but I do have to say (this is not directed at you but more a general point, and a tangent inspired by your comment) that referencing “social media” as some sort of Year Zero for attention seeking or desperation for popularity, as if these things didn’t exist before “Like” buttons, is somewhat inaccurate .

I guess you were referencing the “search a name” aspect rather than the “attention seeking” though. 

I assume the exact opposite unless EITHER she hasn’t learned, in all this time, how to distance herself from that legacy, OR she is letting it happen 

There is a photo of the back of my head in an issue of Jockey Slut magazine from 1999, as I am getting some records signed by Dot Allison at her debut solo gig which the magazine was reviewing 

I met Seb Coe once at a do, tapped him on the shoulder and said "excuse me Mr Coe" forgetting that he was a Lord.

He was utterly charming and chatted to my 11 year old son about his athletics and his times.

Not pompous at all 

No, of course it doesn't. Her name is utterly cryptic and bears no possible link whatever to the original name. Googling her name reveals nothing about her background. I presume her email box is absolutely empty in that regard.

I wouldn't recognise most of the folk mentioned!!

However, I once led a couple on  a guided walk from Hawsker to my home in Robin Hood's Bay.  

With me were three very heavily armed close royal protection police officers in plain clothes,  their guns concealed in rucksacks , and/or around their bodies.  They were guarding the couple I was taking for a walk.

In the village we went in one of the local cafeterias for a snack - paid for by the couple - and little did anyone else know that the 3 rucksacks contained numerous fire-arms and that each of the officers carried more concealed weaponry. 

But the surreal bit was the couple had to walk up out of the old village to pick the rest of their security team up.  There is nowhere in the old village you can fit three heavily armoured Range Rovers without drawing huge attention to yourselves, so as it was now pouring with rain I  suggested we all waited for the rest of the team in our house.  And thats what we all did. Machine guns and all!

Through his wife, who I know very well through our mutual profession (which is nothing to do with show business).

Climbing claims to fame shouldn't really count in this thread: one of the beauties of climbing is that we so often get to rub shoulders with and climb alongside the very best, no matter what grade we climb. 

I'm not sure Jarvis Cocker counts either because of a) Sheffield and b) I've seen him countless times at various festivals. I was in a festival crowd once when someone literally rubbed shoulders with me as he went by. Took me a second to realise it was Robert Plant - that one definitely counted. 

She was an odd woman, stunningly beautiful in her day, I have a black and white photo of her on the wall which visitors always comment on. My uncle was an acrobat she met on tour.

Sadly, she died a lonely recluse, refusing all offers of help and only talking to essential services through the letter box. I wrote to her  regularly but the last time she was seen in public was at my mother's funeral in 1988. I think of her most days as she was very wealthy and left us money that paid off the mortgage and enabled my wife to go part-time. Kind of sad but not sad, if that makes sense.

I'm just surprised it hasn't leaked out though. All it takes is one thread like this with someone less discrete than you on it.

I have a friend in a similar position. She deliberately took a very ordinary name to avoid attention, but it's out there now and people track her down and send hate mail on a regular basis.

Was attempting Josephine at Ilkley Quarry when just starting out as a teenager in the early 70’s. After down climbing S Crack, Pete Livesey came over and shouted encouragement.

I was standing in line at the Queen’s Scout parade at Windsor, the Queen stopped and spoke to the lad next to me.

Shared the urinal at Old Trafford with Fred Trueman (seemed quite short for a fast bowler – height that is)

Waiting to cross the road near my home a couple of weeks back, a car drew up driven by Tracy Brabin. She gave me a rather nice smile.

My links are very tenuous.

I worked in central London so saw a few well known people from time to time.

More than once, close to Broadcasting House, I saw Pete Murray, the Radio Luxembourg and BBC DJ

Passed David Yip, probably best known for 'The Chinese Detective', in The Strand

Ordered a drink in a bar next to Josie Lawrence.

Almost bumped into David Milliband in Parliament Square. He was hailing a taxi I was watching the traffic instead of where I was going.

Stood in a queue behind Fish, ex lead singer of Marillion at a Kenwood House concert.

In the early 1970s sat next to the Malcolm Macdonald in a coffee bar in Newcastle.

Was having breakfast at Plas y Brenin and Chris Bonnington was doing the dame at the next table.

Dave

Blimey, that would have put me off my cornflakes 

Theresa May a few times on Cadair Idris and the surrounding area.

How the hell did you guide Jim? He is the least "guidable" person I've ever met?

I guided him to the pub!

He gave a talk in Leicester, arranged by a local climbing club, and the plan was to go to the Marquis of Granby pub afterward. He and his wife between them didn't fancy the double task of driving a manual car AND micronavigating unfamiliar city streets at night, so I got in the car and navigated them to the pub. 

Bravo!

youtube.com/watch?v=Ljm9CDRAhMQ&

That makes sense. A friend and I climbed a new route up a minor Patagonian peak with him about five years ago. Despite us being in our prime (and one of us being a mountain guide) and him being in his seventies there was no guiding of him going on. The only thing he was reluctant to lead with was carrying the excessive amounts of gear we carried in. He played the old man card on that!

I don't think I've ever been so ruthlessly sandbagged about an approach. Certainly not by someone who then came along.

I've just thought of a claim. Dave Birkett once spent half an hour explaining lime mortar to me.

Unfortunately, he speaking broad Cumbrian - as he does- I didn't  understand a word he said. Nice bloke though.

busking outside queen street many years ago and being applauded by rikki fulton (a stan getz fan apparently) Going into the wee tea room on lonely colonsay and budging up with the Queen of Narnia (tilda swinton) john byrne and <ahem> "extended family" - JBs drawl wise cracks were priceless

speaking of Narnia, I spent ten days in a guesthouse in Aberdeen in the bedroom formerly taken by the White Witch in the BBC TV Narnia serialisation.  I hunted high and low for boxes of turkish delight but sadly none ...

On the subject of children's literature. My friends dad shoved dynamite in a crack in the rock of Llandudno (clearing space for a slipway) that CS Lewis is purported to have used as inspiration for the walrus rock in Alice in Wonderland. Before he could go any further someone from Llandudno council asked him to stop. It now has a massive split down the middle of it.

Coffee with Ueli Steck.

Judo session with Putin (not actually training with him as I am quite a bit heavier).

CB

Meth lab?

We've all had a piss next to Chris Bonington!

Similar to Al Evans, I got to meet dozens of celebrities and the same ones as Al Evans, a hotel I managed in Liverpool had the contract with This Morning when it was at the Albert Dock so just about everyone who appeared on it spent a night or 2 in the hotel. If anybody remembers Sacred Spirit? They had a hit record probably in the mid to late 90's. They were appearing on This Morning but got into a fights with just about everyone they saw and most of them spent the night in the police cells so not sure how that programme went. Just about all of them were really nice, standouts were Jim Bowen, Sean Hughes and Steven Fry but not Daniel O Donnell.

My cousin was a cameraman on Brookside for years then turned director, he now mostly works in America and worked on Breaking Bad and lots of other stuff, I think he worked on Casualty and a detective thing with Robson Green.

Another Hawkwind connection, my brother's band have supported them and played festivals with them at least 4-5 times. They recorded an album at Nik Turner's studio, somewhere near Welshpool. After that Nik Turner used to give one of the band saxaphone lessons over the phone.

It was around 27 years ago, but even allowing for the dimming of memory with distance, no, I don't think we made that in  the lab. 

He was a bright young guy. His dad sounded cool.

I've kept my A level years school reports as the English report for each term is written in beautiful script by the person who took the last known photograph of JRR Tolkien.

Apparently I could have met Blue Straggler at the Jim Donini lecture, unfortunately I didn't...

Jim gave me a lift home afterward, I had a train ticket but he and his wife were staying in a hotel not in Leicester but in the town where I live, so that saved me a trek back up London Road to the station, plus I got bonus conversation from Jim

I photographed Nicky Morgan once, in a professional capacity. 

I've worked with (and dined and drunk with) Professor Phillip Manning off National Geographic's Jurassic CSI! 

A fair point. I won't ask for a detailed description of the Alpine Club member as proof.

I was walking out of college with some mates when we spotted Jeffery Archer approaching us down the path. 
 

We made eye contact and he walked directly towards us with an outstretched hand. We just looked at him like a nutter and walked around the entitled prick. 

I met the legend that is Sir Garfield Sobers a few years ago when he came to my school to promote a cricket festival for schools in the West Indies. He actually played against a relative of mine ( a Middlesex spinner) on his first overseas tour and was happy to reminisce about his early matches. We staff were delighted to meet him but the pupils didn't fully appreciate that he would get into everybody's Best World Team Ever ..... ie. he was easily in a comparable league to a Lionel Messi  or Ronaldo from a different sport.

I’ve met the late Duke of Edinburgh and Prince Charles (separate events).  
 

I once had a long chat with Peter Mullen.  I worked in Ruchill in Glasgow where they filmed My Name Is Jo. The lads I worked with nicked a van load of Ken Loach’s equipment. It was ‘recovered’ in a pub.  Peter M was doing a promo thing. We congratulated on his award at Cannes. Sound bloke. 

 

Anna Friel and her famous-ish bloke walked past me and my mate in a bar in Turkey. I nearly drowned that night when I fell in the sea jumping from a ship onto another ship. 

Friends of a friend (vague acquaintances of mine) had Hawkwind as their wedding band a couple of years ago.

My daughter and I were walking across Central Park in New York many years ago and, in the centre of the park on the grass, bumped straight into the actor Chris Farley (with his friend) - star of Beverly Hills Ninja and Saturday Night Live fame. I said 'Hi. how are you?' Chris looked very, very wary and uncomfortable. We walked off

I'd forgotten about cricket - my uncle Eric kept wicket for Notts during and shortly after WW2, took the wicket of (Sir) Don Bradman when they played the touring Aussies...

Though there have been many less tenuous meetings in my past, perhaps the most tenuous one might be meeting cricketer Neil Fairbrother's dad while buying tickets for a beer festival at Grappenhall cricket club.

Nice chap, happy to chat about pretty much anything to a total stranger for about ten minutes until it started to rain.

T.

Well, if you're going down that road - I once shared a Pakistan Airforce Hercules with Kinga Baranowska and a bunch of other well known but less attractive mountaineers.

Edit: And a contingent of beardy American Special Forces who were dropped off in Peshawar.

One of my old caving pals starred in a film with Mel Gibson. OK, 'starred' might be over-egging it a little. He can be seen walking down a ship gangplank with several hundred Aussie troops in 'Gallipoli'. 

Gary Sobers' brother worked as a Securicor driver in Nottingham and often delivered to our premises. (Gary played for Notts CC he was very keen on horse racing and it was well known that he would come in to bat for a quick thrash but unfortunately be out just in time to go and watch the 3.00 clock at Kempton Park or whatever.)

That's what I was just wondering, I guess a strong emotional drive can make people do things which aren't entirely rational.

Along the lines of 'This family name is so awful, I'll make up an entirely new and unique first and last name', rather than 'Smith'll do'. Smith seems an easy name to blend in with.

I got chatting to a bloke who was friends with one of their (Hawkwinds) dancers. I ended up giving him my two Inner City Unit albums (Nik Turners band).  

Call that tenuous!  There’s a bloke who uses a forum I use. Well, one of his old caving pals starred in a film with Mel Gibson. OK, 'starred' might be over-egging it a little. He can be seen walking down a ship gangplank with several hundred Aussie troops in 'Gallipoli'. 

Now that’s what I call tenuous. 

When I did the youth job in Ruchill, Glasgow, we did a drumming workshop. It was filmed by Tom Busby, an actor from The Dirty Dozen. My lads, unknown to us, got full of jellies and kicked off massive style. Tom went to calm one of them down and looked him squarely in the eye resulting in a full-on head butt. It then got bad, police and all sorts. 

I’ve just dropped my youngest daughter off to play football for our local women’s/girls side where one of her team-mates is Anna Friel’s cousin.

My youth worker colleague and Bessie mate was an extra in Trainspotting - the scene were Begbie goes mad in a pub. 

I met and climbed with Jim Donini the first time I visited Enchanted Rock, Texas. I met up with an English climbing friend of mine and the Texas Mountain Raiders climbing club at the Brewing Company in Frederiksburg, having driven the whole way from New Orleans (about 10 hours drive). The club was all crowded round one big table and there was not much room there for an extra persion, so I sat at a table alongside. The only other person on that table was a rather wizened looking man. After a while I asked if he had done any climbing, and he said "Yup, I've done a bit". So "I said I am looking for a climbing partner for tomorrow".  It was Jim Donini and we climbed together the whole weekend, mainly cracks. It was actually a bit of a masterclass in crack climbing - he had some very good general advice about the best approach to different kinds of cracks. He was  good company to climb with.

Another youth worker colleague was at Glasgow’s School of Modern Art. These two guys came in and said ‘wanna watch a cool video?’ It was those two from the KLF and my mate saw the first ever showing of when they filmed themselves burning a million quid in that croft, on Mull?

I have a few:

I used to live near John Tams and he introduced me to Sean Bean who told me that I should be a Sheffield United supporter, which I sort of am to this day. If I were forced at gunpoint to choose a national league team.

I waved at Yasser Arafat from a cafe in Tunis and he waved back.

Robert Lindsay told me and a mate that we were "going in the book" for being Heanor Town FC supporters at an Ilkeston Town FC match. My mum used to look after his grandmother.

He was in front of me in the Tesco’s checkout buying a four pack of Stella.

He told me he needed it coz some fool had given him shit directions on his walk and he got lost.

I made the last bit up.

Jura.

I’ve met William Heaton Cooper (Lakes artist) a few times when I was a kid: my grandfather used to cut his hair in Grasmere. 

That’s the place.

I spent time developing an alternative community currency with this bloke, Tony,  who was bezzie mates with Mark E Smith. He told me he saved his life coz he’s been in his pub constantly for a few weeks drinking mega lager and he got him some silver liquid stuff. His next door neighbour was Jah Wobble. He also toured with Oasis as ‘their friend’, whatever that means ?!

I’ve been on holiday with Anna Friel.

I’m on the left end of the back row, Anna is four from the left on the front row. The kid two in from the left on the front row is Paul Greenhoff, son of Brian, nephew of Jimmy.