UKH

Unsure if this is pheasible for me, but I went on a health spa yesterday and felt great. It's my second day with very little alcohol and I feel much better for it.

I've not lived alcohol free for many many years, always having a pint in the pub lunchtime, evenings or on a hot day in the garden during summer. Always finding an excuse to partake.

The build up has a negative effect on your health so now I'm going to try and give up alcohol totally. It's a big challenge for me someone who usually drinks every day. Maximum six pints, minimum a half.

Are you tee total and have you kicked the demon booze? Please share your hints.....thanks

In reply to Earlgreytea:

Being teetotal is just the same as before except that the company of drunks becomes less tolerable. Since drunks are very dull it's an easy price to pay.

In reply to gravy:

Nonsense. I’m great fun when I’m drunk 😉 

In reply to Earlgreytea:

After surgery I went teetotal for a while. I previously drank modestly several times per week but always thought I'd struggle to go teetotal. It was ok. Try the 0.5% beers and don't have other booze in the house?

In reply to Earlgreytea:

I don't drink everyday now but have had times where I realise that I am having one or two beers a day consistently for long periods, I know it's not the same as your situation - but I found that sometimes I was literally just thirsty without realising it so I bought loads of cans of nice soft drinks like pepsi max and vimto and fanta and lilt etc. so always had something refreshing and tasty in the fridge.

Then you can just reach into the fridge and grab something easy and tasty that's not a beer.

I know won't work for the pub situation as well, but thought I would share the idea.  

In reply to Earlgreytea:

I was alcohol free from my early 20's until my mid 30's, which is when I found that spirits don't make me glum/sluggish like beer does. 

It was tricky at first when I did start not drinking, but more to do with societal expectations than on a personal level, which required learning not to mind too much. 

I can now take or leave alcohol, after a short spell of learning how it can insidiously 'tap tap away' at you in a certain way, a little bit like developing a tolerance of salt in food so that you need to add more to be able to taste it, now leaving it for meeting up with particularly friends who seem to like a drink (I seem to have a low frequency of drinking above which it becomes too habit forming). I find if one gives up any thoughts of 'being logical and normal', a certain freeness of not caring arrives which isn't dissimilar to the disinhibiting effects of alcohol. Drunk people probably won't remember anything you talk about too.

Given the randomness and strangeness of life, there's a little bit of a philosophical question around why we all try to be normal and logical rather than following our more natural selves, I think, but that's a bit of a tangent.

Keep hold of the reasons why you want to quit and go GRRR against the urge when it arises, and the rest will follow...

In reply to Earlgreytea:

I have been tee total for 32 years now, might be 33)

The hardest part was peer pressure but once I realised that didn't matter it became very easy to maintain. 

No tips I'm afraid, I had the motivation of an alcoholic dad (very high functioning but well over the driving limit all the time) and an inability to moderate myself. I could see the road ahead and just quit. 

In reply to gravy:

Cheery and friendly drinkers and drunks are cool though, I developed a soft spot for them while a none drinker.

In reply to Earlgreytea:  kids and living out of town limit your time/days available to drink and be unable to drive.  Keeping busy and having something non alcoholic instead be it a 'soft' drink, fizzy water or fruit tea.  So I haven't drunk much for the best part of 20 years outside specific occasions.

Timmd - Gish a hug mate drunks are not so appealing - your taste may differ

In reply to wbo2:

I more had in mind a fellow in a men's toilet confidently going on about the bowls of pot pourri and similar he was sure exist in women's toilets, compared to the grimness of the ones we were in at the time, he went on for some time about how plush and luxurious women's toilets are.  A kind of silly which doesn't often happen among sober people.

In reply to Earlgreytea:

Just in my 50s and apart from a couple of months trying to "fit in" in my late teens, have never done it.

Hate the taste, from experience, I'd rather drink petrol.

Bonus is the money I've wasted in far more interesting ways, bikes, cars, boats, climbing, kitesurfing, women etc etc while work colleagues can only talk about weekends they've spent "wasted" 🙄 

In reply to Earlgreytea:

I gave up alcohol about 7 years ago because it was increasing my anxiety and depression and also having an impact on my sports/exercise. For me I gradually decreased my intake overtime and saw the benefits until I ended up teetotal. 

I still spend time around people who do drink and really enjoy the social so I don't feel as though I have lost out. Some of my friends and acquaintances had difficulty adjusting to my teetotalism, but in the end the 'I don't drink anymore' message got through clearer than 'just 1 pint for me tonight' and I still keep many of the same friendships. I tend to drink fizzy water or tap water which makes things pretty cheap but will get a round in for the people I'm with if I'm feeling generous. People love offering to buy me a drink since it tends to be cheap!

I would recommend steering clear of sugary drinks if you can, in my view this is just exchanging one evil for another. I have learnt 4 pints of lemonade in 1 evening doesn't sit very well.

I have heard that if you want to break a habit, you should start a new one. This has been true for me. Rather than spending an evening in the pub to socialise, why not go to the local climbing wall? Or join any sort of sports club? When you feel the urge to drink, how about eating some good food or taking some exercise outdoors? Reward yourself for not drinking, maybe with an enjoyable film or some music. 

I would forgive yourself on the days that you lapse. Just remember why you are quitting and keep going, 'don't quit quitting' as they say.

In reply to Earlgreytea:

Years ago, when I was recovering from a particularly bad hangover a friend remarked. "at least your day will get progressively better than a teetotaller's." 

Hats off to those who have managed to be teetotal. I'm trying to reduce my alcohol intake to a sensible level, but finding it hard.   

In reply to Earlgreytea:

it may depend on your personality or relationship with booze, but gradually tapering down could be a possibility?

In reply to Earlgreytea:

In the immortal words of Rab C Nesbitt. " See me, see drink- ah can take it or leave it.Mind you, ah'd sooner take it !"

In reply to Earlgreytea:

Microdose psilocybin. Seriously.

In reply to Graeme G:

Me too, and like James Bond in the sack!

What's not to like, plus someone else can always drive......

(I'm dry January this time though to break my habit a bit)

In reply to Dax H:

I'm exactly like you. I wasn't a heavy drinker but I gave up decades ago. And am glad I did; I don't need it, my health is better, I saved a fortune, never need to worry about driving

I know what you mean about peer pressure... but friends quickly realized I was off the booze for good. Yet the hardest part for me was socializing/ being out with friends who were knocking the booze back at parties or in the pub. I stayed exactly the same through the evening but they changed progressively, becoming noisier and more boisterous and some not understanding/ accepting why I wasn't

Like you I have experience of alcoholics: I shared a flat for a while with 2 serious cases (they'd be drinking at 7 AM and sometimes drunk by 8 AM) - very unfunny and TBH enough to put anyone off the booze for life

In reply to artif:

Same here, most of my mates would have 1 activity, the money saved not drinking allowed me to do all of them that I wanted.  Probably not as easy these days though, I remember a pint costing about 90p in the late 80s and a pint of coke 10 to 15p. The gap has closed these days. 

In reply to Earlgreytea:

I packed in drinking alcohol in June 2020, following a vicious hangover.

Red wine was my drink of choice and I had been becoming progressively less tolerant of it.  Splitting headache often coming on after a glass, staying with me all night and into the next day.  Dodgy tummy often too.

So I knocked it on the head.  Wasn’t initially a “never going to drink again” moment. I just didn’t fancy it any more and the urge to drink has disappeared.

I didn’t get any of the often touted benefits of stopping drinking (weight loss, more money, better looking etc), but I definitely have much more energy, don’t have weekends spoiled by feeling ill and am always capable of rational thought and driving.

In reply to Earlgreytea:

As per elliot.baker, I found it helpful to have a range of strongly flavoured drinks on hand: that way I can drink something that's fun, and not feel that I'm missing something.  Fanta, freshly squeezed OJ, spicy tomato juice all work, as do the more vibrant fruit tea/infusions (if you don't mind the slightly woo association with fruit tea!)

Good luck with it!

Edited to get Elliot's name right 🙄

In reply to Dax H:

A pint in Wetherspoons can be had for 99p just now. OK, it's only 3.7, but yes, it took me back, if not to the '80s, certainly the '90s.

I feel a lot better without drink, and manage to keep to 1 /2 pints a week. 

In reply to Earlgreytea:

I used to be a weekend heavy binge drinker til I was married (18 to 33), didnt miss it too much & still enjoyed beer & whisky in moderation at home. When my mother was terminally ill 5 years ago I did start drinking 1 or 2 cans every day when I was home on my own midweek (120 miles away, wife taking care of her). I put on weight & felt unhealthy. Since then I've only drank 2 to 4 cans/bottles each weekend & rarely get drunk. Since May this year I've stopped alcohol altogether since it was exacerbating a health issue related to dehydration. I find that Ribena squash is very nice and late at night drinking chocolate helps a lot. I've missed it less than I expected I have to say. The latest 0% (& 0.5%) beers & lagers are a nice change too, the good thing is you don't want more than 1 or 2 in an evening. Probably better than 'energy' drinks or colas.

In reply to Earlgreytea:

Try doing dry January. Takes some commitment at the start, but the end is never that far away.

In reply to Earlgreytea:

Hi 

I'm not tee total but have done numerous 'Dry January's' normally going to April without a drink, once til the middle of July and in 2018 the whole year without alcohol.

I can only say that every time I've given up I've felt a million times better both physically and mentally.

I'm actually looking forward to 2022 already as I've been on the wine a fair bit these last few weeks and will be setting my sights on the whole year alcohol free again.

Go for it.

Giles

In reply to Earlgreytea:

I stopped drinking in June and after initially doing 90 days I'm now looking to do a year but to be honest I can't see  myself starting again. Was a heavy weekend drinker for 18 years prior and after having a kid was wasting too much time either drunk or not feeling great the next day. My anxiety is so much less than before and I'm fitter than I have ever been in my life.  Alcohol free beers are light years ahead of where they were even a few years ago and I tend to take those if I'm going to a friends house or for a meal but resent paying the same as a pint in a pub (but still do for one or two). I'm happy to go out for one drink or a meal but can't see myself spending ages in the pub like I used to. 

In reply to Earlgreytea:

I posted on here in May 2020 about this.  I'd been worried about my drinking getting to epic proportions (blank memory spots in the night, mood swings, 'weekend' drinking bleeding into the week until I was drinking pretty much every night) so I decided to stop for a couple of weeks...but after a few days started experiencing sleep disruption, anxiety etc...that's when I started to contemplate words like "alcoholic" and "dependency' and it really scared me.  

So I posted on here.  And I read a lot of stories of about other peoples relationship with alcohol. And it was a massive relief to find out that mine was a really common story.  I got tons of support from the UKC, both on the forum and via private messages.  I quit for a year and it was pretty much the easiest thing I've ever done.  (I've drifted back onto it stupidly, but I'm ready to jump back on the wagon pretty soon).

If I could give you any type of hints, it would be (in no particular order)...

Don't necessarily think "I'll quit for x months / forever".  Set yourself an easy target at first.  I think mine was a week, then a month, then a three months, then I just thought "stuff it.  Do a year"

Get a good book.  I read a couple, but  "The Naked Mind", by Annie Grace was recommended to me on here and it helped me think about alcohol in a different way.  Helps you undo a lot of the lifetime of marketing that has been thrown at you telling you how awesome alcohol is and how you can't have a good time without it.

Listen to or watch talks by people who have come a cropper with alcohol, and their own stories about how easy it is to fall into a bit of a rut with alcohol

Don't try to "not" think about alcohol!  (Because that would be impossible).  But try and think about it constructively.  Watch the tv adverts and think about how they're selling it.   Don't avoid the alcohol aisle in the supermarket if your partner is buying a cheeky gin. 

Don't become a militant non-drinker   

Realise that every day you go without a drink is a reprieve for your liver, and a couple more quid in the bank.  If you go a month and then have a pint "meh".  Don't beat yourself up

And please feel free to drop me a message if you need some support or just to say "I'VE JUST GONE X DAYS / WEEKS / MONTHS without a beer".  

I definitely found this forum a help though.  I really hope it gets you off to a running start. Please let us know how you do.

TC

In reply to artif:

Forgot to add, which may have had an influence on my attitude to drinking.

I worked the door of a nightclub for a while, in my 20's, you get to see some sights. 👀

In reply to Earlgreytea:

ive gave up last year Christmas Eve , went out with old work mates got very drunk and the hangover next day did it for me, ever since then I haven't touched a bit. Before this night out, I was drinking most evenings and it progressively got more and more as the months went by.

I found the reasoning for giving up very easy , my health , no more hangovers or feeling groggy every day, save money , climb a lot more and enjoy it. 

at first I found it hard to sleep for a while , but after time it got better , I found alcohol free beer worked well for me, plus I would go out and buy an array of different teas like green tea, peppermint etc. 

hope this helps 

In reply to Earlgreytea:

Good luck , hope it turns out well for you.

My abstinence started as an experiment, trying to get a good night's sleep. It takes some time to get the crap out your system, but it really worked. 
By the time it worked, I had lost weight without trying and it made a real difference to my climbing. 
Keeping it up is all about having goals. I’m 62 next year and would like to get at least another decade climbing at a reasonable grade. Having the weight off has stopped my fingers etc getting injured so much and I use that as motivation. That and feeling generally so much better in myself.

In reply to Earlgreytea:

I could easily be teetotal - and have been during other times - but now I probably have 1 drink a week. Lots of reasons but largely got more intolerant of it and suffered from terrible hangovers that made my life miserable (after just one drink).

Anyway I doubt I'll go back to regular drinking. I sleep better, I don't have headaches, lose weight, save money. Also I have a heavy drinking family and started to look at the borderline alcoholics in my family in a different light.

In reply to Earlgreytea:

You know reading all of these submissions has made me really excited to actually get back on the alcohol free wagon again, (and also made me feel like a tw@t for getting back off it again).

Can I also add that weight loss was phenomenal during my alcohol free year and I lost close to 4 stone.  It was badly needed but painless.  Not only are were the huge amount of dead calories in beer not being consumed, but I was also not making stupid pi**ed up food choices at 11pm, like a deep fried pizza wrapped in kebab meat.

As of now, I'm back on t'wagon.

In reply to Earlgreytea:

https://hubermanlab.com/dr-anna-lembke-understanding-and-treating-addiction...

A very interesting podcast about addiction (not saying your an addict) but it helped me understand why and how we might get addicted to certain things and what we can do to change that. 

In reply to Earlgreytea:

I started abstaining from alcohol for Lent after having 'too much fun' through my teens and twenties, it was starting to seriously catch up with me. I was typical weekend binger with some weekdays thrown in often. I now only drink a handful of times a year (Christmas, weddings, occasional big get togethers with friends). Even then I tend to self-limit the intake.

Having a consistent climbing schedule and goals really helps, same applies to running or other sport. If you can make it early morning, that'll be a good incentive to avoid hangovers. 

I would recommend starting small. If your a daily drinker I'd probably start by taking 5 days off, then work up to a full week, then maybe two separate months off in a given year. If you live in the pub you'll probably need to be ready to accept some changes to your social life, you may see certain people less. If you decide to stay hanging out in pubs and bars when trying not to drink that's a doomed strategy. Ultimately it's a small price to pay for better outlook, less depressive/anxiety symptoms, being happier, healthier, lighter, more alert and ready to deal with life's problems. It also saves considerable money and leaves you time for more productive and fulfilling activities.

If you can stay off it for 30-60 straight days and are above the age of 30 without any serious pre-existing trauma or history of addiction in the family you stand a good chance of not reverting to old habits, if you've built some enjoyable new habits/routines.

The other replies on this thread so far are very pertinent and would heed just about every bit of advice given. 

In reply to Earlgreytea:

At 87 I am still to have my first pint,Father drunk enough for both of us.Had my first glass of wine at 44 and quite enjoyed it .drank it in moderation till 3 years ago and more or less gave it up.Have had 1 glass in the past year and may have one over Xmas.I was given a taster set of Malts last Xmas and thought I was drinking paint stripper ,Yuk.When I had my first MI 20 odd years ago the guy in the opposite bed admitted drinking 10 + pints per day,turned out he had indigestion,such is life .Still manage 6a at the wall but long walks not the pleasure they used to be.

In reply to TheDrunkenBakers:

What, already?  Having a dry Christmas too is next level!

In reply to PATTISON Bill:

I think it'll be flat by now!

In reply to PATTISON Bill:

Lager Shandy with lime with a packet of Smokey bacon is overrated.

In reply to thread:

What I'm getting from this is that it's almost total abstinence rather than reduction.

We pretty much gave up during the lockdown period as we didn't want to end up drinking every night in the house. I found it surprisingly easy to do.

I think the main problem I have with giving up is the impact on my social life. Probably not the thread to say this, but I really, really enjoy a drink in a pub with my mates. Not in a get totally shitfaced, puke on the floor and wake up with my face in a kebab with a hangover that lasts a week way, but in a get together with friends, have a few pints of good beer in a good pub and relax and enjoy each others company way.

To me that's one of life's great pleasures. Although I don't have a drink if I'm driving, I have to say sitting in a pub with a soft drink or a 330ml bottle of 0.5% that costs as much as a pint just doesn't cut it.

I've certainly reduced my intake since I was young and daft, and I have seriously considered giving up. I've been pretty low for a while and have been considering antidepressants, but I don't think I'm at the point of giving up just so I can take the pills, as I think not being able to enjoy social occasions as much as I do with a few beers will probably negate the antidepressant effect

Just my 2p worth.

In reply to Earlgreytea:

Just another memory.

While eating breakfast at an outdoor pursuits centre, one of the our instructors was nursing a fierce hangover. After offering him some Aspirin he replied. "This hangover has cost me a lot of money, so I'm going to enjoy it!" 

In reply to Earlgreytea:

Good thread.......and hope things turn out well.

In reply to Earlgreytea:

I have a hard rule about only being allowed to drink one day of the week, and over the years that’s effectively turned into being teetotal. For some people moderation is possible, for me it’s easier to just cut things out almost entirely.

This started just after finishing university back in 2014. During my fourth year I’d started drinking a small amount everyday to deal with the stress, and after graduating I realised this probably isn’t such a good idea.

Growing up in Yorkshire in the 90’s alcohol was everywhere, most of the adults I knew could be classed as functioning alcoholics. And that got passed on to my generation too, a lot of friends my age have had pretty significant drinking problems. Realising that also made it a bit easier to put the bottle down!

In reply to Earlgreytea:

Hey. 
Something that has always stayed with me was a weekend on Arran with our climbing club. Some of the members enjoyed a tipple or twenty and got guttered both Friday and Saturday night. At the club meet the next Thursday one of them commented how they “got absolutely rat arsed, can’t remember a thing, aye it was a great weekend”!!! ????
Huh!?!?

Also, at my work, some of my colleagues would go out specifically to get tanked, out of their tree pished! I’ve never understood this mentality at all. 

I gave up drinking in November 20 after realising that trying to stay fit (at 57) and climb hard didn’t sit well with 2 or 3 glasses of wine a night, every night. I realised, or felt like, I was slowly turning into an alcoholic. No real bad hangovers as such, just fuzzy headed, and groggy feeling. 
I’d also been having slight heart palpitations and rather than taking statins as recommended by the cardiologist, I decided to change my lifestyle a bit, cut out booze, coffee and dark chocolate, all high in caffeine, and eat less meat, more vegan/vegetarian.

The booze was and remains the easiest to live without. Socially I drink fizzy water with lemon and that makes me feel like I’m taking part, at least until everyone else becomes noisy and pissed, then I tend to make my excuses and leave. We have dinner out in the season pretty regularly and again, its water with lemon for me. 

I really missed coffee so factored that back in, but only first thing in the morning. Dark chocolate has gone but I do eat the odd milk chocolate now instead, but not much. 

I would just add that November + December 20 began my best sport climbing season ever. I had begun training more since summer 20 and I’m totally certain that the dietary changes and especially cutting out alcohol were the icing on the fitness cake, so to speak coupled with a related small weight loss.
That fitness is also addictive but in a good way. 
All the best to you. 
 

In reply to ThunderCat:

How could you not know that’s just wrong. Everyone knows the kebab goes on the inside!!!

In reply to Graeme G:

I was a bit drunk at the time

In reply to Earlgreytea:

I get horrible rhinitis/bad sinuses at the drop of a hat. Alcohol makes it quickly  worse as it dilated the  blood vessels in nose. So even one drink can be like a bad cold and invariably stops me sleeping properly. So more or less don't drink alcohol. Younger folk are much more easy going but men in my age group (over 60) think it's a bit odd.Generally don't miss it except it smoothes the tongue at awkward social events. Plus I'm rubbish at starting a conversation with people I don't know- mainly in the pub. But I can live with it and lack of alcohol definitely makes me feel healthier if not a tad more antisocial.

Slight plug,...

I work for a  local alcohol charity and we are doing a giveaway of some alcohol free / non alcohol drinks to highlight Alcohol Free Christmas options. If you are interested in winning (or just helping us raise the profile of the posts ) go to https://www.facebook.com/DerbyshireAlcoholSupport  or @alcadvice on twitter...  all you need to do is add your favourite non alcohol christmas tipple.

We wont contact you for anything other than if you win. A local student has taken on the role of upping our social media presence so helps her out too

Doesnt matter if you aren't local... we will post the prize to a UK address!

In reply to Ridge:

That sounds like an agreeable way to spend time with friends. I was speaking to a friend, who commented that most people are probably a bit down at the mo, because of the winter weather. If it continues into the spring and summer, maybe that could be a time to start wondering about taking them? Dark chocolate can help with the winteriness.

In reply to artif:

If only the Mrs would take some hints from this thread. Last night was another one with a couple of bottles of wine and the associated pain in the ass she becomes, I'm getting tired of it now.

If wasnt for our son I'd be out of here

Apologies just needed to vent

In reply to Earlgreytea:

Not given up drinking but I have effectively given up being drunk, I cant handle it any more - I went to a wedding a few weeks back and I guess partly because of it being the first big social I had been to since the pandemic I removed all boundaries and ended up paying for it handsomely, throwing up until lunch the following day and still feeling effects about 4 days later... All for 4 hours of fun.

I wont ever be a teetotal, I enjoy a beer too much. If I have a stressful day, then some exercise followed by a cool beer or some wine is about as medicinal as it gets. No intention of denying myself that.  

Nothing against teetotallers if thats what you want but I am not sure why you would ever pursue being teetotal specifically if you enjoy alcohol, its seen as a "vice" but there are more important lifestyle changes people can make first, like not motorising their backsides around when they can walk/cycle.

In reply to Richard Horn:

I'm going to disagree here. While the benefits of more exercise are obvious, I think the single biggest lifestyle change for health improvement would be significantly reducing or eliminating alcohol intake. It's not just the intake itself, but the web of culture, life decisions, knock on effects of time spent in an inhibition reduced state, mental health relate issues, food choices etc surrounding that intake that make it a bigger factor IMO. 

Regular alcohol intake often limits the inclination and time available to walk/run/cycle/climb, so is more of a factor broadly speaking. Ideally reduction in that intake would be accompanied by an increase in exercise.

In reply to TomD89:

I think it probably depends on the individual, a family friend has always had 'something' to drink each day, which suggests he's alcohol dependant to a certain degree, but he's (now 70ish) had an active life of climbing and hill walking, and running Duke Of Edinburgh courses, and had a fairly well paying career, he's one of those characters who doesn't sit still. It wouldn't work for me, but it seems to for him.

In reply to artif:

With you all the way on that, although you forgot to mention chocolate as an excellent money sink 😁

In reply to ThunderCat:

 

The Annie Grace book Kindle version is free if you have Amazon Prime, but I’ve only skim-read it so this isn’t a recommendation. Personally I’m wary of books which promise a route to drinking less, rather than drinking nothing ever again, but I appreciate it’s easier to start the journey (and buy the book) believing that it ends in moderation rather than abstinence.

In reply to Earlgreytea:

I love my beer, wine and whisky but I've managed to go 45 days now without a drink.

Not in a row or anything, just in total..  

In reply to Thugitty Jugitty:

I think her approach is a good one. It is about an exploration, experimentation and developing awareness. It helps overcome the psychological barrier associated with making a sudden decision about 'never drinking again'.

In reply to Richard Horn:

This is dangerous. Alcohol becomes a crutch, a supposed coping mechanism for anxiety, like marijuana, when there's no evidence to support it, and in fact it makes anxiety worse. They seemingly help. 

To the thread in general. Moderation is harder (much harder) than abstinence for a true alcoholic. And low alcohol beers are just gateways to harder drinks and a slippery slope. Plus a relapsing alcoholic is the last to realize they are relapsing and out of control again. I'm not saying an alcoholic can never drink again but it's a risky move for sure.

In reply to Thugitty Jugitty:

I think the central message of the book is to drink as much as you want, but to try and program your mind to not actually want to drink...so in effect, giving it up.

I think I'm slowly realising that I've just not got the self control to moderate.  I didn't miss the beer at all when I was on my year off it.  But the stupid mistake of having the one cheeky beer after the year was up was stupid.  I can feel the intake slowly creeping up again.  I feel like punching myself in the head, to be honest

So yeah, I'm getting back on it again.

In reply to Earlgreytea:

I usually do Dry January, have done for as many years as I can remember now. At first it was quite difficult, I did have that feeling of "needing" a beer, but in recent years to be honest it's not bothered me so much. I then tend to progress to just weekends, a couple on a Friday, Saturday and Sunday usually at home. By November time the weekend tends to get extended a bit, and December to be honest tends to become a bit silly, last Christmas I did get to the point where I didn't actually want another night of beer as the cumulative hangover was hurting too much. This year I gave up alcohol from June - August, this was admittedly at the request of Mrs W as were were having another go at IVF so I needed to ensure I played my part, and to be honest having a damn good reason to give it up helped.

I do like beer though, especially modern good quality craft beers. Usually on Dry January I just avoid it all together, occasionally try a supermarket alcohol free beer and regret it as they taste crap and then just go back to water. The weight loss benefits are always worth while, and as anyone who's developed a liking for craft beer will be able to tell you, you save a ton of cash too as it's a damn expensive hobby. During the summer dry period I tried a few much better craft non alcoholic beers, and found some really nice ones. So, if you drink beer because you like the taste then there are options nowadays to enjoy good beer without the alcohol element.

I'm actually quite looking forward to Dry January this year, I've got some lard to shift...

As others have said, just take it a day at a time, fill your time with other things and you'll certainly feel much better. It doesn't have to be an all or nothing approach, it's perfectly reasonably to just have a couple of beers at the weekend if you want to, though avoiding regular nights out is probably a good idea since the "I'll just have a couple" never really works once those couple of beers have turned off the sensible limiter in my experience.

Good luck

In reply to Richard Horn:

I have been teetotal for decades

I enjoyed alcohol a lot when I drank, but now I enjoy the following much more than boozing: the better health (especially long term) that comes from not drinking, feeling very good and well every morning/ never getting a hangover, and having more money and time for what I want to do e.g. in climbing and in the mountains (drinkers I know spend a good proportion of their money on booze)

Also I've never seen alcohol as a vice

In reply to Greylock:

There's a huge difference between being a 'true alcoholic' and enjoying a pint or two. Abstinence is just a crutch for people who can't cope with beer 😉

In reply to Earlgreytea:

I enjoy a beer or a drink, socially at home, I'm certainly no teetotaler. Just had a VERY large portion of Jim Beam white label with a dash of coke But always finding a drink, mostly every day for years?? That doesn't sound healthy even from my drinker's perspective. Especially as we get older you can get away with it less.

Maybe a good alcohol free stretch of time is something you need at this point? If you feel better for not drinking, maybe that's your body telling you something

In reply to TomD89:

Can there be some real perspective added at this point.

At present I drink each day. I maybe spend an hour or two at a pub and have a couple 

I meet people and socialize, usually strangers, and I don't get 'tanked' but realise I have a dependency.

It does affect my health, so I will walk more cycle every other day and restart at the climbing gym after Christmas 

Over the past two years, I hardly seen much of friends or family, and stay away from pubs at peak times. As I'm semi retired I have too much time on my hands 

Does this rebalance anyone's views?

In reply to Ridge:

Dependency even if it's two every day is dependency.....

In reply to Earlgreytea:

That's for you, your friends and family to decide. I don't think you have to try to rebalance anyones views. Plenty of people drink often and have no issues stopping after 1-2 beers. But plenty of people do have issues and end up chasing that feeling and as tolerance builds they drink more and more. 

Strangers can't make any accurate judgement which camp you are in and really shouldn't. I see friends who I have real concerns about but I know me commenting won't make a difference, if they have a problem it'll get worse, the wheels will come off and they'll get help when they are ready too. If that doesn't happen then there was no problem. All I'll do is risk isolating them and risking our friendship.

TBH I'm not even sure family and friends can step in until rock bottom is hit, even then people will keep falling until they are truly ready to make changes and go through hell for a few weeks. 

Re alcohol free living, it's pretty easy once you've not drunk for months and then years. You really don't miss it. There's certainly moments that hit you, adverts, stressful times, random relaxing moments you used to associate with drinking but it ends up being fleeting thoughts. 

In reply to wildebeeste:

Imperial college found microdosing to be placeboic. 

Just fully dose instead. 

In reply to Earlgreytea:

Yes, being semi retired and having too much time makes the situation more dangerous, even easier to habitually drink a little too much for long term health.

Take up a new hobby then your spare time will evaporate. I suggest for a climber.. try caving. Not necessarily all the wriggly claustrophobic thrutching but there's a lot of wide open spaces vertical caving about.

If you are near the Dales, how about  youtube.com/watch?v=RQC0Q4fEY6E&

if closer to Peak, what about youtube.com/watch?v=YABxRFZk9tI&

Then there's gaping Gill (dihedral route is not claustrophobic by any means! Quite the opposite, very impressive)

Cavers are friendly, much less cliquey and elitist than climbers can be, you'll easily find people to take you on a trip if you ask them nicely

In reply to CantClimbTom:

I've tried caving before. Thanks but no thanks.

BTW if it was not for Covid I'd be away during the winter Scuba diving.

There are major limitations on travel ATM.....

In reply to TomD89:

I wouldn’t let your personal circumstances cloud your view here.   Plenty of people where alcohol intake neither impacts their health nor time available to walk/run/cycle/climb etc.

In reply to Presley Whippet:

It's one of those issues where the jury is still out. There's a lot of literature over here supporting md'i ng , including work from respected institutions such as Johns Hopkins. We could each cherry pick articles at each other ad infinitum. 

Instead I would encourage the OP to read around for himself and possibly try it. My own experiences dealing with first responder stress and PTSD have been very positive. 

In reply to wildebeeste:

Agreed, it will need a meta survey of all the available data at some point. I suspect the sample size is currently too small.

The problem with any survey into intoxicants is the understandable confirmation bias, we simply want them to be positive. All those red wine cures cancer etc articles.

To the op. I have an amount of experience of being alcohol free. It takes some getting used to but it is broadly positive. Well worth pursuing. Modern af beers are very, very good, some better than their alcoholic counterparts. This is great at home, not so great out on the town where their adoption by pubs is variable.

If/when you lapse, hangovers feel much worse because you are no longer accustomed to them. This helps keep you on the straight and narrow. 

In reply to Presley Whippet:

Hi could you recommend some AF beers? Preferably craft beers. I've stopped 9 days now, which isn't much but feels massive. I've always been a frequent drinker and definitely drink too much sometimes. I'm trying to improve my sleep and craft beer related bank balance  

In reply to helin:

Not a craft beer (what’s the definition anyway) as you can get it in Tesco - Erdingler Weissbrau Alcohol Frei is really nice.

In reply to Presley Whippet:

I only moderately drink, and had some red wine before bed last night, which I sometimes do, and it was agreeable, seems to be that keeping the effects of alcohol in the 'agreeable' box, rather than 'more myself' is the thing.

In reply to Sealwife:

Yes that's the only one I've had. It's nice but hoping for some proper craft beers - there's some microbreweries near me I'll try

In reply to helin:

Try Brooklyn brewery - special effects you can get it in Tesco, the mikeller ones are the best I’ve tried but are pricey

In reply to Levy_danny:

Will try that, thanks!

In reply to Earlgreytea:

A couple of people on here have recommended replacing booze with fruit juice and/or soft drinks. That's a good way to get a massive excess of sugar into your system. Pure fruit juice may appear healthy but it doesn't take much to overdo the sugar intake. A friend some years ago cut out beer (he doesn't drink wine) for a few months mainly because he wanted to lose weight. On weekends away when everyone else was having beers or wine, he'd demolish a box of Bundaberg ginger beer. He quickly put a lot more weight on and became chronically fatigued. 

This is a separate point to habitually excess drinking, but worth considering if replacing volume is a key aspect in addressing your drinking habits.

I should drink less frequently but I've zero intention of giving it up, I love wine too much and I don't think I've got any signs of it becoming a problem or impacting negatively on my life in general. If I live long enough and become incapable of physical activity I can see me seeing out my dotage in a red-nosed haze but I'm fine with that. I'm wary about alcohol in general though as a friend and a few colleagues have/have had drink-derived problems and it makes me examine my own habits more than I might otherwise. 

In reply to helin:

I used to drink BrewDogs Nanny State.  Completely over hopped which gives it a bitter edge but certainly not a lemonade type AF beer.
(Though I see their CEO has been in the news for the wrong reasons recently…..so you might have a view on that)

In reply to Wimlands:

These are pretty much all I get now even though the ceo is a bit of a pricK by the sounds of it. They don’t fall into the trap of having a load of calories in like others do (one of the initial reasons I stopped was for weight loss) and you can usually get them at an okay price in the supermarket. It’s not quite as  close to the real thing as Brooklyn or as some of the more expensive ones but I find that once you’ve been off the real thing for a while you don’t need it to be and they are refreshing and nice when they’re cold. 

In reply to Levy_danny:

That’s my other favourite.

I was a wine drinker when I still drunk alcohol but find AF wine is really not very good.   The AF beers I’ve tried are much better.  They’ve come a long way since Kaliber.

In reply to helin:

There are few bad ones nowadays, we have certainly moved on from Barbican and the like.

I like brewdog lost af, it is better than its alky cousin, I find the punk and nanny States OK too.

Others that are surprisingly good, Erdinger (I can't stand the alky Version) ghost ship and special mention to leffe. Loony juice Belgian beer actually works without alcohol. 

In reply to Earlgreytea:

Ok, s*d it, I’m in. I’ve been following this thread and trying to ignore it. I don’t like drinking that much.. but I do it anyway. Sometimes.. sometimes I like the taste. Often I don’t. I don’t like the cost, the calories, the results on me or the effects I see on peoples health (not mine yet thankfully). I don’t like the fact that when doctors ask me if I drink too much I’m slightly less confident than I used to be. I don’t like the fact I do it regularly at home. I don’t like the lack of energy, even when there’s no hangover. I don’t like the fact I’m more tolerant of it than I used to be. I don’t like the fact it’s my go to for relaxation and stress relief. I don’t like the fact it’s normalised in front of my kids. I don’t like it. Ok?

I’m done.

I was thinking I’d try and go TT in January, but you know what, that never works.

🎶 So here it is.. Sober Christmas, everybody’s having fun! 🎶

I’ll have a nice cup of.. yes you guessed it, EGT. If any of you are ever buying me a pint, mines a semi skimmed. thanks!

In reply to Currently Resting:

Alcohol intake always negatively impacts health to one degree or another. It's fine to weigh that with enjoyment and make your own choices on levels of consumption, but it isn't correct to say it has no health impact.

Anytime someone has had slept in due to a hangover when they planned to go for a morning run/cycle has had their time and health impacted by alcohol. I would suggest there are very few alcohol users that have not lost any time to alcohol.

In reply to Earlgreytea:

You have a self described dependency and drink every day. You've clearly discerned that you feel better after time off drinking and set yourself a goal to try give up. I think having established all that before starting this thread, you owe it to yourself to give it a proper go. 

In reply to TomD89:

Diet is also often really poor after drinking due to the hangover and impact on blood sugar levels. You drink a lot of calories but you also eat a lot the day after drinking. Alcohol has a real impact on your blood sugars. 

In reply to Greylock:

i find it easier to abstain than moderate. I do admire those that can just have half a pint and leave it at that. 

In reply to Sealwife:

I may be lacking in sophisticated taste but I actually find aldi's 0% pilsner quite pleasant. It's a lot cheaper than the crafty ones too.......... I must say I resent paying a lot when there isn't even any alcho based tax!

In reply to Richard Horn:

I thought the same for 35 years but but surprised myself. After surgery I went teetotal for a while. 

For some "followed by a cool beer" almost never stops at "a" beer (singular). Teetotal or alcoholic may be their binary choice.

In reply to elsewhere:

Receiving or doing surgery?

In reply to artif:

If you like the taste of petrol you'd probably love Ardbeg single malt.

In reply to Rog Wilko:

Good one!

In reply to elsewhere:

Exactly. And that then makes drinking a stressful unenjoyable activity. Because you know you'll want more, you'll be embarrassed as others stop drinking and then start drinking secretly or feel awful trying not to have one more. So just not drinking is easier, more enjoyable and less stressful.

'Just drink less' is impossible for most alcoholics.

'One is too many and a thousand not enough' as the saying goes.

In reply to Earlgreytea:

I reckon the 1st rule of forums should be to not care 'too much' about what others think, or at all probably - but avoid expressing not caring, because somebody will pipe up with 'Well you did start the thread'.

That said, since you did start the thread, I don't suppose you have anything to lose in seeing what reducing drinking further does, you might suddenly discover more bounce or mental spark?

Possibly as an aspect of my mental health which  I manage with pills, I seem to only need 3 double G&T's to get me through an evening and into small hours when I do drink with certain friends, and I know that I'll not have so much bounce the next day, but it's worth at the time as a nice 'sideways diversion' from everyday life.

If I could drink more I probably would do, I see no virtue in only moderately drinking, I think that kind of quasi-morality isn't very helpful for anybody.

Good luck, whatever you decide to do.

In reply to Greylock:

Anecdotally, the policewomen on duty in the local nightclub area where I used to live in Surrey always had chocolate on them, which they'd offer to aggressive young men who'd had a tankful; apparently it worked a treat to calm them down.

The link between alcohol and calories is worse than that for me. I find it easy to become dependent on a bottle of wine in the evening, and the insulin rush that it provokes has me eating all sorts of crap that I don't need in order to feel better Or maybe it's part emotional, part physical, I've no idea.

Very regularly I give up alcohol in order to lose weight, which has always worked well. However the kilos have tended to go up overall, the pandemic was a disaster of disastrous proportions weight gain-wise, and now I'm going to need a year off, or a change of attitude, in order to keep a good active lifestyle doing things which motivate me.

So I think a change of attitude is the way forward.

At the moment, I'm thinking minimal alcohol in a social context, and none otherwise. I'll let you know how it goes.

Thanks for your contributions everyone!
 

In reply to minimike:

Currently enjoying an Indian with said cup of Earl grey.. surprisingly good! Better.. I might say. 

In reply to Mike Stretford:

The Aldi one is enjoyable and as you say reasonably-priced. I find the Lidl equivalent makes me to gassy even with one.

Erdinger Alkoholfrei as previously mentioned is nice. Franziskaner Weissbier Alkoholfrei is another similar Germanic option.

For more alert ones St Peters Without/Without Gold are decent and come in a lovely bottle. Harviestoun Wheest is a 0% dark ale. Big Drop are a brewery who only do 0% beers, their Galactic milk stout and IPA are tasty. Tempest Brewing do a 0% pale ale called Sleight of Hand.

I can't stand sugary soft drinks as beer alternatives, but what I do enjoy on occasion are malt drinks. Mighty Malt is my No1, Supermalt is another option. To be found in the Caribbean/world foods aisle.