UKH

Damn it, I'm fed up of the Brexit threads dominating this forum! Whatever has happened to all the other topics? This used to be a fun forum, now it's all bickering and hyperbole.

In a change of tone, what pointless achievements have you...achieved recently.

I have managed to brush my teeth while balancing on my balance board. I also jumped up onto a wet stone sphere without slipping off. My dog was astounded.

In reply to Flinticus:

I have managed to brush my teeth while balancing on my balance board. I also jumped up onto a wet stone sphere without slipping off. My dog was astounded.

Maybe Border Collies aren't that clever after all.

In reply to Flinticus:

To be serious, this is one of the biggest problems that the Brexit fiasco has foisted on us: it's one hell of a time-waster. So many businessmen are now necessarily preoccupied by this entirely unnecessary heap of nonsense, which impinges on most of our days now and much of our thoughts as a mighty distraction from creative productivity. Not to mention all the hundreds of lawyers and negotiators and government ministers, who are wasting time discussing and scheming and playing with riddles rather than getting on with running the country.

In reply to Flinticus:

I suppose I take some responsibility for this. May I offer an apology?

In reply to The Ice Doctor:

Fixed that for you.

In reply to Flinticus:

I decided that I could repair a finger injury using only a cheap scalpel and an enthusiastic attitude.
Unfortunately their was a lot more blood than I expected, it really bloody hurt and has now turned quite the unusual shade of yellow. Turns out that amateur surgery is as bad an idea as it sounds.

Not really an achievement but better than talking about brexit.

In reply to Greasy Prusiks:
It seems as fast as one injury/ condition clears up, I get another. Goodbye tendonitis in my finger, hello rotator cuff problems in my shoulder.....

In reply to toad:

Bummer. Injuries do tend to run like busses, none for a while then three at once.


Still, if you want me to wipe off my scalpel and fix your shoulder for you remember, I'm just a PM away!

In reply to Flinticus:


I totally agree.


Although not totally pointless I have learnt that I can do dragon flags and can plank for 6 minutes +

Now that far more interesting than DOOM DOOM DOOM FEAR DOOM DOOM DOOM FEAR.

In reply to Flinticus:

You don't have to read them, FFS!!

This come up time and time again, just change the channel if you don't like the program.

In reply to krikoman:



Shouldn't you have followed your own advice there ? rather than complaining about the thread ?




Peace

In reply to Flinticus:

Brexit is the tonic to the loss of Indyref #1

In reply to Flinticus:


I did my first solo wild camp on Sunday. Set off in the dark, navved for 3 hours. Set up camp, got 2 hours sleep - then was in the middle of a storm for the rest of the night (strong gusts, hail, heavy rain, lightning). I'd stupidly not packed the extra poles and the good pegs, so spent the rest of the night worrying about when the guylines would come loose again and trying to fix them.

In reply to Flinticus:

I have made 12 litres of limoncello.

In reply to Flinticus:

I have made 12 litres of limoncello.

In reply to That Shallot:




I wanted to see what the thread was about, and I contributed to the discussion. In that I don't mind topics about any subject, and I'm prepared for the flack I get for topics I start and people don't like.

I didn't start another thread moaning about anti-berexit topics topic.

It takes about 30 seconds to get the gist of a topic, if the title doesn't give you the heads up straight away, so isn't this thread just another chance to have a whine about other thread?

In reply to Cú Chullain:


That's 24 litres of limoncello, that a lot of limoncello

In reply to C£ Chullain:
So you now have 24 litres


Edit: my arithmetic is clearly not as fast as Krikoman's.

In reply to Gordon Stainforth:


Clearly a typo but I assume you meant 'ruining'.

In reply to Greasy Prusiks:




I thought that was going to be an analogy for brexit!

In reply to BigBrother:


Nicely spotted. It could be read that way, and perhaps we should be grateful, given their incompetence, that they are distracted from doing their job.

In reply to Gordon Stainforth:

“No man's life, liberty, or property are safe while the legislature is in session.” - Mark Twain.

In reply to Flinticus:

Sigh...

Much more pressing issue: what the honk is supposed to be the difference between Down The Pub and Off Belay? Is there any difference in their remit or the threads there? Or is OB just for daytime drinking?

In reply to toad:


You sound like me, but you forgot the sciatica in the left butt down to the toes!

In reply to Just Another Dave:

Post in OB if you want it to be saved and for non-members to see it. The pub is where it's a bit safer to post something personal, slag off your employer, etc, as it disappears quickly and isn't visible if you're not logged in.

In reply to Flinticus:
I'm learning to swear by emoji because a 16 year-old who (self-appointedly) moderates our club Facebook group had an attack of the vapours because I wrote 'p1ss'

Edit; emoji don't work here, thus confirming the pointlessness.

In reply to Flinticus:

I have very nearly reached my 64th birthday.
I have no idea why or how, it all seemed so impossible 50 years ago.

In reply to JEF:



You can get your butt down waxed off, hopefully the sciatica will be attached to the down so will be removed at the same time.

Let us know how you get on.

In reply to krikoman:



I don't have any wax, but I do have gaffer tape. All in the name of research!

In reply to JEF:


Any results yet?

In reply to Flinticus:

Which camp is raising all the Brexit topics, those who voted Remain, or those who voted leave ?

In reply to Moley:


Will she still love you?

In reply to Cú Chullain:

I made runny scotch eggs. Won't do it again as it was proper pain the ass, but glad to have ticked it off the to-do list

In reply to Baron Weasel:


I don't think you should be using your arse in the manufacture of scotch egg, runny or otherwise.

I'd put money on this not being a Mary Berry recipe.

In reply to krikoman:

Gaffer tape results were so so.

In the absence of wax I tried Autoglym car polish, that doesn't work either.

In reply to Flinticus:

Oh I'm all about the pointless achievements! I regularly use them to make up for my lack of actual achievements.

Current favourites include catching autumn leaves mid air, hanging upside down and doing stomach crunches, and throwing stuff to hit a target. In fact, throwing pebbles with accuracy is a special skill of mine, along with imitating tawny owls.

In reply to krikoman:

Had to point out to a work colleague today, that eggs don't come out of chickens arses. We were having a conversation regarding hens laying eggs and egg sizes...

In reply to Flinticus:
Well we are going to need something to lighten our day and replace the helicopter mountain rescue implementation updates when phase 3.52 subsection 8.7 roll out 2.6 finally comes to an end !

In reply to Flinticus:

Botted 90 bottles of apple wine last sunday. Racked another 15 gallons of wine today.

Having a sit down for a bit. Ears feel warm.

In reply to Alyson:

A speciality of mine is throwing full dog poo bags into the bin (vertical opening about 6 in high) from several metres away. The contents affect the trajectory... I have gotten pretty good at it.

I also play dog bowls which is throwing a tennis ball high into the air and getting it to land as close as possible to your pup.